2005 Imperial Processional Baroness

 In 2004, Hasbro created the concept of Comic Book packs.  This product feature three classic G.I. Joe figures along with a comic for the low, low price of $9.99.  The main selling point of the comic packs, though, was the figures included would be updated to reflect their comic book appearance.  For the initial wave of figures, this meant almost all new heads were used on the figures.  Among the newly sculpted heads was an updated Baroness.  This design featured longer, flowing hair, an improved face sculpt and, most importantly, the ability to wear removable glasses.  Despite the ambitious attempt at re-doing a collector favorite figure, Hasbro fell a bit short with the design.  Collectors didn't really warm to it and the Baroness/Cobra Commander/Cobra Trooper packs quickly backed up around the country...even though they included a popular army builder.  As the Joe line died in 2005, Hasbro attempted to reduce costs of their Toys R Us exclusive offerings.  The figure mold choices included in the final four sets was not inspired and the accessory complement was even worse.  In the Cobra Imperial Processional set, the new Baroness head appeared again.  This time, it was atop an oddly colored body that was a shade between red and copper.  Once again, collectors ignored this Baroness design and this 2005 has fallen into the abyss of figures that have been left behind by today's collecting world.

One of the things we know about the Hasbro designers of the Joe line in the early 2000's is that they somewhat resented vintage Joe figures.  They couldn't build their resumes in the industry working on two decade old toy designs.  This was why there was far more effort spent on the JvC figures and, later, the anniversary figures than the vintage repaints could have ever imagined.  This is a big reason why the repaints of that time aren't very inspired.  At times, though, the designers got to do something new on vintage figures.  One of those items was the removable glasses for the 2004 Baroness.  In theory, this was an amazing idea.  Taking one of the character's hallmarks and turning it into a changeable part of the figure was somewhat ingenious.  But, just because you can do something doesn't always mean that you should.  And, while the idea behind removable glasses is good, the actual execution left much to be desired.  The glasses are bulky, cloudy and generally ruin the aesthetic of the Baroness's new head sculpt.  Another example is the Baroness' hair.  While her updated hair is more detailed than the 1984, compare it to the 2005 Cover Girl who was released the same year.  It's a night and day difference in what the designers were capable of creating.

The Processional set was another idea that was probably pretty good.  But, the execution wasn't great.  The figures feature and odd copperish-red color that doesn't match with any other Cobra figures in the line.  Cobra Commander and the Baroness made sense for figure inclusion.  The idea of 4 guards wasn't bad.  But, the molds combined for the guards were just a bit too offbeat.  Had this set included a Serpentor and been done in green and gold, it probably would have been substantially more popular.  Were the figures even in a more classic red, they'd better fit with other figures and be more key to collections.  As a stand alone figure, this Baroness isn't that great.  The 2002 Convention figures are substantially better and work well with more figures.  This figure can work as a cheap alternative.  But, that's about the extent of her value.  The new head isn't a perfect match for the body and I prefer the original Baroness head in every release.

Baroness' gear is crap.  The glasses are small and easily lost.  But, since most of the figures are in collector hands, they are not hard to find.  But, they really look bad on the figure and there's no real need to have them.  They are difficult to affix to her head.  And, once on, the glasses look far more like goggles than corrective eyewear.  Again, a good idea whose resources should have been spent on better weapons for the figure.  Aside from that, she includes a crappy silver pistol that was originally released with Ambush.  She can't really hold it well and it appears oversized with the figure.  Baroness never really had any great accessories.  And, this release is no different.  The entire set lacked accessories.  And, Baroness included the only firearm among the 6 figures.

The Baroness mold has a short and long history.  In the vintage line, she was released just once: in her classic black outfit in 1984.  This same figure saw packaging in European and Japanese markets, too.  In the mid 1990's, Funskool acquired the Baroness mold.  They released a figure that was a direct homage to the American Baroness for a few years.  (Funskool Baroness figures are relatively easy to find in comparison to her Funskool contemporaries.)  As some point, Funskool released Rednok in the Complan Commandos line.  This was a low quality red Baroness that is exceedingly rare.  Hasbro got the mold back in 1997.  That year, they released a nicely done blue Baroness figure.  She wasn't quite cartoon colors.  Nor was she quite Cobra blue.  But, it's a nice repaint.  In 2000, the mold was redone in black and red but released as Chameleon.  Again, this is a solid figure and the color scheme was based on the unreleased 1995 Baroness that was planned for Battle Corps Rangers.  In 2002, a crimson Baroness was released in the initial convention set.  This, and her fuchsia variant, are excellent releases.  After that, the quality dropped off.  This new head debuted in the 2004 comic pack.  This figure was also blue.  But, generally, didn't stand up to the 1997-2002 figures.  The mold died with this 2005 Processional figure.  Hasbro never gave us a true cartoon colored Baroness.  Nor did they give us a grey and black version.  In short, we got two poor Baroness figures instead of something collectors would have enjoyed.  And, the new head really shortchanged the 2004 and 2005 figures even more.

The Imperial Processional Set was a dud.  It was a dud in retail stores.  It was a dud online.  It was a dud with collectors.  And, it was a dud with kids.  It sat and sat and sat.  Eventually, sets were sold at Amazon.com for around $6 each.  Even at that price, it took them quite a while to finally sell out.  Even today, these sets are relatively easy to find and Baroness remains cheap.  Because the market is crazy and many buyers are dumb, you see dealers, from time to time, get between $15-$21 for a mint and complete with filecard figure.  Left to her own devices, though, the same figure will sell between $5 and $7.  If you want a Processional set, you can get a complete one for around $30 and that's probably the way to go.  Outside of the matching figures, this Baroness has little value.  For a figure that Hasbro used quite frequently in the repaint era, the quality of Baroness releases diminished after 2002.  That's too bad as the mold has potential and cartoon fans are left without a definitive version.  This figure remains just another reminder that Hasbro of that time simply couldn't get it together when it came to collector themed releases.

2005 Cobra Imperial Guard - By Past Nastification

Return of the Jedi gave us our first really good look at The Emperor (I’m talking about the time before the prequels).  Sure, he was cool.  But cooler still were his helmeted and cloaked personal bodyguards.  The Emperor’s Royal Guard were badass yet stoic*.

Someone at Hasbro saw value in the concept and imported it to GI Joe.  

Replace the Emperor with Cobra Commander, and replace the Royal Guards with Imperial Guards and you’re good to go.  The Imperial Guards (four of them!) were included in 2005’s Cobra Imperial Procession set, which also included a Cobra Commander figure and a Baroness figure.  Like the Royal Guards, the Imperial Guards are encased in their uniforms from head to toe, with no visible hints of humanity.  The Royal Guards’ uniforms are crimson and burgundy, and the Imperial Guards’ are not too far off, featuring mostly dark metallic fuchsia with dark bronze elements.

The Imperial Guard is a far better concept than it is a figure.  

The figure, in ARAH format, is made up of a Range-Viper head/waist/legs, and the chest/back/arms of Cobra Commander V3 (Battle Armor version).  Dropping CC’s personal bodyguards in a recolored bastardized version of his own armor is somehow fitting, but the Range-Viper head is far too iconic to work as anything but a Range-Viper.  A Cobra Officer head, with a retooled neck, might have been a more interesting choice.  

As far as accessories, Hasbro disappoints.  Each Imperial Guards got a flag.  Yes, a flag.  Because you can use a flag to defend your leader from assassination attempts.  The flags feature nicely done flagpoles.  So there’s that.

Although it would have been overpriced, I’m sure the GI Joe Collectors’ Club might have been able to do something interesting with this concept.  Hasbro tried, but not enough.  

*It’s important to point out the Royal Guard (or whatever the hell they were called) later shown defending Snoke in Star Wars The Last Jedi were horrible.  Disney tried to hybridize the Royal Guard with Power Rangers and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, creating some truly rancid designs.   

2005 Cobra Imperial Guard - Around The Web

The 2005 Cobra Imperial Processional set was an odd duck.  In the general sense, it was OK.  The idea behind the set was strong.  But, the colors were weird and the accessories weren't great.  The set was quickly relegated to clearance and collectors were able to acquire these figures for about $1.00 per figure for a good long time.  Today, the set hasn't taken off.  But, it's still a lot more expensive than it was during those clearance days.  Here's the best of the Imperial Guard from around the web.

Imperial Guard Profile

Imperial Guard at JoeBattleLines.com

Imperial Guard by yotothejoe

Imperial Processional at General's Joes Reborn

Imperial Processional Review at JoeBattleLines.com

Imperial Guard at JoeADay.com

Rarities - Unproduced Copper Cobra Imperial Processional Figures

Hasbro produced a lot of exclusive vintage style Joe figure sets for Toys R Us in the 2003-2005 timeframe.  These sets were extremely popular with collectors and proved to be the only real outlet for vintage Joe aficionados to acquire new releases at reasonable prices.  Some of the sets were great.  Some were terrible and most were in between the extremes.  However, just about all of the sets had some unproduced and pre production variants.  While many of them are well known and common in the collecting world, others are more obscure.  A case in point are the copper figures from the 2005 Imperial Processional set.

Below you see the Baroness and the Cobra Imperial Guard figures.  The Baroness is noteworthy for the missing Cobra sigil on her chest.  But, both figures are a much duller copper color than the figures that were released at retail.  The full production figures were more red and had a generally brighter hue.  These copper alternatives seem like color tests from early runs.

These figures are somewhat dull.  But, the Processional figures were dull even as production releases.  I'm not sure if one set is really that much better than the other.  But, these copper releases are fairly rare and are not often seen when you search out unproduced figures from this era.

Unproduced Imperial Processional Baroness

Unproduced Imperial Processional Cobra Imperial Guard

2005 Cobra Imperial Guard

When G.I. Joe returned to retail in the early 2000's, it had a slow build.  The vintage style Joes from 2000 and 2001 petered out on store shelves rather quickly.  The relaunch in 2002 drove some interest.  But, it was full of heavy clearance fodder as repaint after repaint bogged down the shipping pipelines.  2003, though, was different.  The first half of the year was very slow.  But, in the final 6 months of the year, Hasbro shipped nearly 100 new figures.  That massive retail push generated a lot of holiday buzz.  And, as a result, retailers upped their G.I. Joe orders to the point where smaller dealers could not get access to things like the "Army Building Wave" nor Wave 5.  Toy stores had large displays of Joe figures and vehicles that almost completely sold out before Christmas.  To get product to the stores, Hasbro even shipped the first waves of 2004 Venom Vs. Valor figures early.  But, in the first quarter of 2004, all of the enthusiasm for Joe abruptly died.  While stores had been briskly selling every Joe figure in 2003, the 2004's began to stagnate immediately after their release.  Hasbro couldn't get product out due to the pegwarming figures.  The line's demise became more and more of a reality and Hasbro stopped putting their best efforts into their collector themed Toys R Us 6 packs.  The result was that the vintage style Joe figures that were released in 2005 are nothing short of an eclectic, uninspired mix of tired molds, odd colors and terrible accessories.  Buried in the garbage were some solid ideas: just poorly executed.  Perhaps the best example would be the 2005 Cobra Imperial Processional set.

On the surface, the Imperial Processional should have been a great set.  At the time, a Cobra rally was a staple of any collection display.  Having a set designed to augment this collector favorite was a no brainer.  The set included Cobra Commander, Baroness, four Imperial Guards, flags and a dais for the Commander.  It should have been awesome.  But, it was not.  The first reason starts with the coloring.  I'm not adverse to alternative colors for Cobra.  They've always been avante guard in their wardrobe choices.  But, the copper/red choice for this set just didn't work.  It's not a color scheme traditionally associated with Cobra and didn't fit with established Cobra figures.  So, putting the guards and the Commander in the middle of purple, crimson and blue looked very out of the place.

The odder aspect, though, was the Imperial Guard figure itself.  A 1987 Cobra Commander body with a Range Viper head is weird.  The figures look like they are designed to be cyborgs with exposed brain matter.  The Range Viper head has always been different.  But, it's worked on the various incarnations where it was employed by Hasbro.  In this case, though, the overall look just doesn't seem right.  The result is a figure that is neither fun to army build nor incorporate into other Cobra armies.  The fact that there were four of them in the set and they are only equipped with flags: no other weapons, only helps to further sink them.

This set has so many problems that it's hard to list them all.  First off, an Imperial Processional denotes an emperor.  Cobra has an emperor: Serpentor.  So, Serpentor's inclusion in the set would have made much more sense than Cobra Commander's.  But, Serpentor and the Baroness have a somewhat problematic relationship.  So, I can see how that may not have been the best choice.  (Though, I think the true reason was the Serpentor was slated for a comic pack in 2005 and they didn't want two of the same figures available at the same time.)

When I look at this set, it's hard to believe that it could have been bungled any more.  Had it been in traditional Cobra blue, black or, even Crimson, the figures would have at least been useful in a traditional Cobra army.  Using Serpentor instead of Cobra Commander would have been a nice touch and a way to get a Serpentor figure that was differently colored into the marketplace.  If they had used the full 1987 Cobra Commander for the central figure, he would have then better blended with the guards and their uniforms would make more sense.

To say the Imperial Processional set was a flop is an understatement.  Collectors were flabbergasted at such a lackluster effort from Hasbro, especially on the heels of the Crimson Guard sets.  Malaise quickly set in and those who bothered to buy any Processional sets usually stopped at one.  The sets languished through the holidays.  In the summer of 2006, Toys R Us clearanced out their online stock.  First, the sets dropped to $11 each.  But, that wasn't enough.  Within a few weeks, the sets dropped to $6.98.  (To put that in perspective, it's believed that Toys R Us's cost from Hasbro on the set was around $12.)  Even at that price, it took several weeks for them to sell out.  Collectors just couldn't justify spending money on the set, even at deeply discounted prices.

Today, complete figures can be had for $5 or $6.  If you wait for a lot of figures, you can get them as cheaply as $2 per figure and get a large volume of them at once.  There is simply no demand for the Imperial Guard and the pricing reflects that.  Had I not bought this set at its release, it's unlikely I would own it.  It is not a set that demands purchase and there are better figures from the era to be had.  But, since I do own them, I find the figures can have uses.  The throne for Cobra Commander is worth owning.  And, his cape isn't too shabby, either.  These Imperial Guards do look good when paired with the Commander figure and the flags are a neat addition to the Joe mythos.  So, I do think this set is worth picking up if you can get it for under $10 or $12.  Once you get much higher than that, though, the return diminishes and the set starts to falter.

2005 Cobra Commander (Imperial Processional)

Over the years, some of my best profiles were in regards to Cobra Commander. I always felt the character had more depth than most anyone in the Joe universe and was among the most interesting. Now, though, I have eliminated that character from my Joe world. He was replaced with a character that I liked, but didn't really have a use for. The introduction of this figure, though, has changed that. While this isn't the best Cobra Commander figure, or even the best use of this Cobra Commander mold, it is a figure that has stuck with me and become an integral part of my collection.

Really, this figure isn't that good. He's a straight repaint of a pegwarming figure that just appeared about 1 year ago. On top of that, he's a tired mold in a color that's not exactly true to the character. Yet, I like this figure. That comes as a shock as my opinion of him after seeing the first online pictures was one of disdain. However, once I had the figure in my hand, I found myself liking him. Maybe it's the cape or the copper color, but something about his figure caught my eye. It could be just that I had such low expectations of the figure. But, I have found a new use for the Cobra Commander character in my Joe world now that this figure is part of my collection.

If you look at him, this figure suffers from some issues. First, he has the flat back from the 1991 Cobra Commander. However, the inclusion of the cloth cape helps soften that as it hides the flawed mold. The main issue, though, is the black forearms. They are molded black and don't mesh well with the figure's upper arms. This is the most glaring flaw of all as it does detract from the figure. His accessories work for what they are, though. His throne is a neat addition to a collection, even if it isn't very regal and the figure doesn't fit all that well into it. The other figures in the set have the same issues. The Baroness isn't that interesting as she's been done so many times. The Processional Troopers are a neat amalgamation of molds, but the colors make them less useful than they could be. Plus, they come with no accessories except for a flag. So, if you buy one set, you have some figures with flags. If you buy two, that's still all you have. As such, this isn't a set that is very rewarding with multiple purchases. 2, maybe 3 sets are about all anyone would ever need due to the specific nature of the figure designs.

The main reason I'm profiling this figure is because of what's currently happening in my Joe world. Every now and then, I get on a major plot roll due to the most minor thing. In this case, an early morning realization that the Processional troopers looked really good with a sniper rifle coupled with my contempt for the Crimson Guard lead me to the latest plot developments in my Joe world.   As you may or may not know, my Joe world revolves around a Cobra that is very different. The original Cobra Commander was killed in combat a while back. A new Commander was promoted from within. This character was previously named Rector and had been the second highest ranking Cobra in the organization. He was elected to power unanimously and has begun to develop his power base. During Rector's rise to power, he relied heavily upon the Crimson Guard. This politically powerful group on Cobra Island gave Rector his backing and allowed him to climb the ranks. However, near the end of the original Commander's life, the CG's had begun to grow complacent. They had become lazy, corpulent synchophants who spent their days plotting and backstabbing other politicos inside Cobra Island. To a CG, their seat at a state dinner was more important than the training of the Cobra security forces. As such, the rank and file Cobras have grown to despise the CG's and their power base was beginning to erode.

In the meantime, the major Cobra player in my world, Ramen (portrayed by the Brazilian Flying Scorpion figure) had been winning major victories in South America. He and his utterly loyal commanders had won a respect from the core Cobra constituency and were highly regarded by almost all Cobras outside the CG ranks. With this popularity, Ramen was able to remain insulated from the changes in the Cobra hierarchy when Rector ascended to power. This was, naturally, of great distress to Rector as there was now another Cobra leader who actually had control of more Cobra forces than Rector did. What was Rector do to....?

This lead me to my most recent plot point. During a routine parade stop in his parade uniform (which is this figure), Rector narrowly avoided an assassination attempt by a low ranking Crimsonguardsman. This immediately brought down the house of cards and a huge plot called the Crimson Guard Rebellion was uncovered by Rector's secret police. (The Processional Troopers) Within hours, dozens of top ranking CG's were rounded up. In a matter of days, most were publicly executed by firing squad. During this, Cobra Island was under lockdown as the secret police searched for the ringleaders of the Rebellion: Tomax and Xamot. As Tomax and Xamot had once been Rector's most powerful political allies, this was shocking news.

As Tomax was about to escape the Island in the Baroness's plane, a cabal of assassins from Rector's inner circle found him. After killing his entourage of half a dozen of the most prominent CG's, the ninjas took Tomax and the Baroness prisoner. Two days later, Tomax was beheaded in a public square. The Baroness (long disassociated from Destro) awaits her fate. Xamot, though was not found. In his zeal to find the missing CG Commander, Rector revoked all Xamot's diplomatic immunity and placed a $1,000,000 bounty on Xamot's head. All of this has been in vain, though, as Xamot remains at large....

In the aftermath, Rector demanded that all remaining Crimson Guardsmen swear new allegiance to him. They were then sent back down to re-enter Cobra basic training as new recruits. They were completely at the mercy of the drill sergeants they had once commanded. These acts brought Rector a new sense of power as the base Cobra constituency felt that he was no longer a stooge of the CG's. This re-energerization will help Rector retain his power, even though during the hullabaloo, Ramen quietly launched Operation: Dark Cloud....

The history of this figure mold is varied. First released in 1991, the body still retains the remnants of the sonic backpack that adorned that figure. The back was fixed in 1993, but was lost again when the figure was repainted in 2000. In 2003, the mold was used for the Convention Cobra Commander in the Operation: Anaconda set. It was then given this new, more detailed head in 2004 when the figure was released in the 1st comic pack with the Baroness and a Cobra Trooper. It now appears in this set, though with a new, regal cape. That doesn't much help the fact that the mold is a bit stale. It has pretty much been used as much as it can be used and thee isn't much of a future for it. As such, I would prefer to see this mold retired. In fact, I think that the character of Cobra Commander could be retired from the ARAH-style re-paints for several years and collectors would not complain. He has just been done too many times and there aren't that many other molds out there of the character in ARAH-style that would do him justice.

The long term reality is that this figure will be very easy to find. That isn't to say that he necessarily deserves his fate. Hasbro produced less than 20,000 Processional sets for Toys R Us. Historically, this in a minuscule number. Were this figure produced in this quantity in the '80's, he be worth triple digits today. However, the fact is that there aren't many Joe collectors out there. As such, anyone who wants this figure will be able to acquire one at retail for an ample period of time. After that, there will have been enough collectors who army built this set with extra Cobra Commanders that the figure will always be very available on the second hand market. So, this figure really doesn't have much potential to ever rise in price much above the current retail cost. If you want this figure, the Processional set is available nationwide right now. You can also order it from Amazon.com now. Personally, I was very surprised to find that I actually liked this set. While it isn't the heavy army builder that the Infantry, Crimson Guard or even the Urban set was, it is the type of thing that lends itself to most collections. Even with the flaws, I recommend picking up one of these sets.