The Rankings - 1998

The 1998 line might be perfect.  Not that it was all things to all collectors.  But, it had everything right going for it.  The toys were cheap and plentiful upon their release.  Hasbro offered collector themed sets that were still fun.  The figures featured most of their original accessories or, at least, gear that was robust and appropriate for the figure. The line wasn't overly large.  But, was still broad enough to be interesting.  And, there wasn't really a dud among the toys released that year.  I'll argue that the worst 1998 figure would rank in the top 3 to 5 of 1997 and 2000.  It was just an amazing year of figures.  It might be my personal favorite year of releases, ever.  

Really, I started the ranking series because I wanted to showcase the entire year of 1998.  I profiled most of the figures in the set a decade or more ago.  So, I wanted to get back to the year and remember why they resonated so deeply with me.  Part of it was that I was a young collector with money and time living in a place where I had access to tons of these figures.  Part is that the figures were all molds or characters in which I had interest prior to their release.  And, part is just that the figures all turned out exceptionally well.  It's hard to compare 1998 with 2001 as those two years seem as far apart as 1985 and 1993.  But, Hasbro really dialed in the 1998 releases after the lackluster reception to the 1997 series.  So, check out the list and see if you agree with my choices.

#15 - Heavy Duty

When Heavy Duty is the worst figure from your year, you know it was a strong crop of figures.  I didn't get this guy until 2000.  I skipped the MOBAT because it sucks.  But, the figures included with it were strong.  Heavy Duty is one of those guys who, at first blush, doesn't appear all that colorful.  But, in hand, he's got some strong paint details and uses some colors that aren't often seen in the Joe line.  But, he's kind of bland.  He doesn't include any accessories.  And, the 1991 figure is better.  So, he falls to the bottom of the year.

#14 - Col. Brekhov

The Red Star mold is great.  The 1991 release features excellent colors.  This 1998 repaint that was renamed Col. Brekhov isn't quite as strong.  Again, he features excellent overall colors and paint masks.  But, the pea green isn't as appealing as the brown on the 1991 repaint.  Even the comic, though, made a joke about Red Star just being Col. Brekhov.  So, this figure mold was very designed to be the character for which he was used in the 1998 series.  There's no shame in being #14 on this list, though, as the rest of the figures are just so strong.

#13 - Ace

This figure's price makes no sense.  He's not that great.  Even though he is the best paint job of the Ace mold.  Seeing people pay hundreds of dollars for him is just asinine.  This Ace does, though, feature some great paint masks and it remains the most detailed use of the 1983 Ace mold.  When he was cheap, the figure was a no brainer.  Now that he's stupidly pricey, he's a much more unnecessary purchase.  Sure, he looks good.  But, he's not 10 times better than the 1983 Ace.  I'm glad I got one when they were affordable.

#12 - Cobra Officer

Since 1984, collectors had wanted more grey Cobras to match up with the Stinger driver.  14 years later, Hasbro delivered.  The result is very strong.  So, why's he at 12?  Because all of 1998 is awesome.  And, the grey color scheme on the Viper body just didn't pop.  The silver is too close in hue to the grey background and it washes out the painted details that should make the figure among the best of the year.  I wonder if a gold faceplate might have helped.  

#11 - Wet Suit

It's tough to rank the divers.  All of them are pretty similar.  And, none of them stand out from the others.  At this point, it's subjective among your personal favorite mold.  For me, Wet Suit ranks lowest as he's not the best paint job on this mold.  He's awesome.  But, the other two, to me, are better.

#10 - Torpedo

Torpedo is my least favorite of the molds that were released in the diver set.  But, the paint job on him really made the sculpt pop.  The aqua and grey offset against the black base body make for a striking figure.  He really works well and is the best paint job ever released on this mold.  This was my first exposure to this figure mold.  So, the 1992 and 1993 Wet Suits always paled in comparison to this black based 1998 use.  I am happy that Hasbro renamed this mold into Torpedo instead of reusing the 1983 Torpedo mold.  While that might have been a fun figure with the aqua highlights, the 1983 mold has severe limitations and wouldn't have fit with the rest of the 1998 series.

#09 - Shipwreck

Shipwreck is an amazing figure.  Again, the colors work so well for a diver.  And, I love the 1994 Shipwreck mold.  The painted details shows how much thought when into the 1994 Shipwreck release.  Back in 1998, the 1994 Shipwreck was among my top five figures.  So, seeing it available in some new colors was a dream come true.  While I loved the entire diver set, I bought several because of this Shipwreck's inclusion.  Even today, I haven't profiled this figure because I haven't found a way to properly express just how cool I think he is.  So, why is he only #9?  The lack of an included weapon is the main reason.  In later years, Hit and Run rifles became very easy to acquire so you could outfit these older figures with proper weaponry.  But, in 1998, it was pretty hard to get extra guns without buying junk figures.  So, this Shipwreck takes a tumble on the list due to his poor accessory complement.  

#08 - Vypra

I'm not a Vypra fan.  Never have been.  I even skipped this set at retail because I had no use for the figure and vintage Stingers were cheaper than the TRU version at the time.  But, I have come around on her.  She's still too tied to the "evil Jinx" trope just because they share a mold.  But, the paint masks really work for her.  The white and grey oversprays do create a strong visual.  As the original Jinx isn't a figure that's important to me, I've come to see this mold as more Vypra than anyone else.  I still don't use her all that often.  And, while her paint masks are good, they are also a bit sparse.  Vypra fits the visual style of the 1998 series.  But, to me, she's a middle of the road release.

#07  - Volga

I did not appreciate Volga for many years.  Her head is just such a poor sculpt that it's easy to overlook the rest of the figure.  But, Volga's paint details are amazing.  After 1998, we would never see such quality outside of an expensive convention figure.  Hasbro's inability to nail vintage Joe head sculpting also didn't change.  So, Volga's head has held up better than it should have because Hasbro was churning out stomach turning heads through the remainder of the 2000's.  This figure was intended to be Daina.  No idea why it was a made a new character, instead.  The 1997 Lady Jaye mold suffered from quality issues.  Volga is better.  She's definitely aged better than I would have thought back in 1998.  It's not a perfect figure.  But, the paint applications really are.

#06 - Night Creeper

It pains me to rank this guy so low.  Not only is this the best paint job on the Night Creeper mold, it's a stark visual that stands in contrast to all the deeply colored ninjas that populate the line's history.  The white and grey just work on this mold.  You can see all the folds and details on the figure's body and head.  It's colorful enough to be seen.  But, still white enough to be stealthy in the snow.  I lament selling my spares of these figures as a small army of them would be fun to take out in the cold.

#05 - Lt. Gorky

If you've never seen this figure in person, it's difficult to explain how great he really is.  He suffers from the same overly grey body as the Cobra Officer.  But, he overcomes that with a few splashes of color on his face, neck and waist.  It's enough to elevate him quite a bit.  He also features different shades of grey on the chest.  It's subtle.  But, it's enough to add a completely different visual layer to this figure when compared to the Officer.  Photos don't really do the figure justice as he's impressive when he's in hand.

#04 - Snow Serpent

Hasbro nailed it with the 1998 Artic color scheme.  They managed to make the figures realistic to their environment while also giving them the colors and details that make for a great toy.  Their usage of the 1991 Snow Serpent mold seemed like a poor decision in 1998.  The 1985 Snow Serpent was held in much higher regard.  But, this color scheme brought a whole new generation of collectors to appreciate the 1991 sculpt.  The soft greys, subtle blues and perfect usage of black detailing brought this mold to life.  And, he included his full range of accessories.  This Snow Serpent might be a perfect figure.  And, yet, he's not in the top 3 for the year!

#03 - Cobra Trooper

A better Cobra Trooper/Viper or backbone of your Cobra army figure does not exist.  This 1998 Trooper is everything every collector wanted from an army building figure in 1998.  And, Hasbro delivered.  The figure uses a base color of real Cobra blue.  All of his details are painted in black or silver.  The golden visor isn't overbearing and adds additional depth the figure's appearance.  While his gear isn't true to the original, it was a perfect complement of accessories stolen from the obscure 1991 Dusty that filled out the Trooper's accoutrement.  The only two blemishes on the figure are the fact that the head can droop a bit and that he doesn't feature a Cobra sigil.  Both are forgivable and don't take away from the quality of this figure.  Hasbro never got close to this guy in another retail release.  (The convention Crimson Viper uses the same paint masks from the 1998 figure and is a strong runner up in the best Viper repaint, though.)  It is a perfect army builder and was released in the perfect army building set.  You got two of this guy and a grey officer for $10!  In the context of today, that's just insanity...even in 1998 it was unbelievable.

#02 - Firefly

You can say I rate the 1998 arctic Cobras too highly.  But, this 1998 Firefly is perfect repaint.  At the time, he was only the second Firefly ever available.  He was drastically different from the original.  But, he was enhanced in ways that blew the 1984 out of the water.  Instead of a dark grey on light grey wash, the figure gets the requisite white base.  Then, though, all of the details that were obscured in Firefly's original release are painted to perfection.  Colors are blended so that his pouches, grenades, knife and explosives all offset each other and allow you to fully appreciate the sculpting job that had been created 14 years earlier.  These Firefly paint masks then became the base for all the excellent Firefly updates we got in the 2000's, too.  In short, this is a spectacular figure that is worthy of the Firefly character.

#01 - Thunderwing

Yes, it's a surprise entry for the best figure of the 1998 release year.  Thunderwing is another of those figures that, if you don't have one, is tough to see just how great the design, coloring and paint applications really are.  Thunderwing uses a green base color that is unique to him.  It wasn't used again on any other figures.  Building silver, grey and black paint masks on top of it layered in a depth that was standard in the vintage line but largely lost after about 1992.  The rich use of color makes this figure stand out among his peers.  And, even among the line as a whole.  Thunderwing shows what was possible during the repaint era.  Sadly, though, he remained the exception rather than the rule.  Do yourself a favor, though, and pick up a Thunderwing.  You won't be disappointed.

There's a lot of reasons why the 1998 series is special to me.  But, the sheer quality of the entire lineup is the most important of those.  Comparing 1998 to the 2000 and 2001 releases shows just how far those later years fell in quality.  I actually now kind of see 1998 as a pseudo convention set.  You got 15 figures who featured great accessories, remarkable paints masks and a thoughtful mold selection.  The figures look like they were designed to all fit together.  Really, it would have been the best convention set ever released.

Instead, it was released at retail and was stupidly cheap.  Looking back at 1998 prices, we had no idea how good we had it.  Well, that might be a bit of a stretch.  I bought these figures en masse.  Many other collectors of the time did, too.  Armies of the Cobras were a standard for a while.  The influx of collectors in 2001, though, made the 1998's more exotic and expensive.  So, they fell from favor even as they rose in price.  That was short lived, though, and many later collectors were able to stock up on these guys during the late 2010's.  Now, the series is a bit harder to find and will cost you a premium.  (Especially, and inexplicably! for Ace.)  But, they are worth it.  1998 might be the perfect year of Joe releases.  I'm curious to read your thoughts in the comments and whether you agree or disagree.

The Zeroes - Mark X

This is the tenth year I've done this feature.  This past year was pretty good for the site.  Traffic is actually way up.  Not only did the lowest performing posts get way more views than the lowest from last year.  But, there were actually so few that were low that I had to truncate the list a bit.  Most of the items on it are more recent and haven't had the time age into their views like other pages.  The Top 10 in January of 2027 will be more fun to parse through as a lot of posts have had highs.  And, every week, some ancient post rockets to the top of the weekly rankings due to some unknown discussion that is inaccessible due to it being inside some walled garden.

So, here's the lowest viewed new posts of the past year.  I'm curious to hear your opinions as to why in the comments.

Alado - 335 Views

Not a huge surprise.  Crazylegs isn't a hugely popular figure.  And, his Plastirama release from Argentina isn't all that interesting since it's pretty close to the Hasbro version.

1983 Clutch - 405 Views

This was kind of a surprise.  Clutch is, usually, pretty popular.  And, the photo below is my most liked photo on Instagram that I've posted in 2026.  His profile didn't do well, though.  It might have just been bad timing as it seems people still like Clutch.

2001 Wetdown - 385 Views

No real surprise, here.  Wetdown is a character name no one remembers.  He's, at his core, Torpedo.  But, he lacks all of Torpedo's cachet due to the mundane code name.  The fact that's pretty similar to Torpedo is another blow against him.

2024 Sgt. Slaughter - 399 Views

This one is baffling.  The 2024 Sgt. Slaughter is one of the most popular figures released in the 2020's.  He was somewhat new when I wrote about him.  But, no one bothered to check him out.  Maybe he's a bit overexposed.  But, this figure is what every Pulse era o-ring should have been: a substantial upgrade that was still true to the original.  It's sucks that Hasbro only figured it out at the very end.

Funskool Mainframe - 250 Views

Yeah, this one makes sense, too.  Mainframe isn't all that popular.  And, an obscure foreign variant whose only main difference is a grey radio receiver isn't much to get people excited.  And, he was the worst performer of the year.

So, check these out and get those numbers up!  

Rarities & Oddities Month - 2026

It's that time of year, again, to spend a month looking at some of the rarities and oddities of the G.I. Joe line and its adjacent collecting communities.  I'll have new posts every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday.  With a bonus post dropping tomorrow.  There's lots of fun stuff this year.  There's an emphasis on Pre-Production items.  I've found them a fascinating dive in recent years.  And, they're a fun look at what was initially intended to be versus what we actually got.  In many cases, the production items are better.  But, you can be the judge in each case.

The Rankings - 1983 Original 13

Everybody loves rankings, right?  There's no better way to start a pointless argument than to rank items that hold unique, special places to each collector.  Once upon a time, I tried to write up a completely objective ranking of the original 13 Joe figures.  But, even with the stated goal of erasing childhood nostalgia from the equation, the list was pretty much my personal favorites with a few guys bumped up a spot or two.  So, why bother with any of that pretext?  Instead, I'm going with a straight ranking of my favorite figures: starting with the original 13.  I'm only using swivel arm versions as I don't collect straight arms.  And, I'll do the "new" 1983 figures some other time.  I'm not sure I'll get to every year because I'll get bored of it long before I would ever endeavor to slog through all the 1993 releases.  But, I'm going to start with the year that's sure to elicit some opinions.  

The thing is, there are no wrong opinions about these figures.  If Short Fuse holds dear, core memories for you, that's a story worth telling in the comments.  The point of this isn't to challenge your beliefs.  Instead, it's to memorialize mine and prompt a modicum of discussion.  So, on with the show....

#13 - Short Fuse

I just can't get into Short Fuse.  He was never a player in my collection.  He didn't have much of a characterization in the comic other than being an annoying hot head.  And, his weapon wasn't conducive to childhood play.  But, really, he's kind of boring.  His chests harness isn't the greatest design.  But, he's also in a green that's similar to other figures.  So, you don't really feel like you're getting anything special with this figure.  Zap is a better use of the mold.  Hawk is a better use of the head.  I know we had one when I was a kid.  But, mostly, I remember him from the fact that I noticed his mortar mold changed and it was also knocked off by, I think, Galoob for some of their action figure lines.  That's not much of a legacy.

#12 - Grunt

I'm not a Grunt fan.  Never have been.  I've always found him to be boring.  To be fair, I missed the silver knife on his chest...a feature that captivated me when we got a Tan Grunt in 1983.  But, I still see this guy as just a basic infantryman.  His M-16 never clicked with me, either.  It broke thumbs in 1982.  I did love his backpack.  I gave it to Clutch so I didn't waste it on Grunt.  There's not much too him and he lacks the skills to really set himself apart from his more specialized team mates.  At some point in late 1982 or early 1983, we buried a bunch of Joes behind some bricks that lined the stairs up the hill in our front yard.  I remember pulling a well worn Grunt and Stalker out of the space a few years later.  That's about the extent of his use.  He and Short Fuse remain my least used figures of the original series of Joes.

#11 - Hawk

Let's face two facts.  Visually, Grunt is a better figure than Hawk.  And, the debut figure of Joe's leader kind of sucks.  But, I give Hawk the edge over Grunt due to the silver trim dominating the figure.  It gives him a more commanding presence.  And, the over abundance of silver does give Hawk a defining look.  There's not much else going on here, though.  So, he ranks pretty low.  I snapped the thumb of my 1982 Hawk when I tried to give him a Battle Gear M-16.  After that, the character disappeared until the amazing 1986 upgrade came around.  Hawk looks good.  But, if I want to use Hawk, I'll almost never choose this figure.

#10 - Grand Slam

Grand Slam and Flash  share the same mold.  The darker green on Grand Slam is a definite downgrade over the brighter green that Flash uses.  As a kid, we only had a straight arm Grand Slam.  The Silver Pads version was my Grand Slam.  I used him as a derivative of Flash, though.  The lack of accessories drops Grand Slam down a bit.  But, this figure does get a lot more use from me now.  Mostly, that's due to the fact that Grand Slam has remained pretty obscure over the years.  And, he's a guy who holds a certain, undeserved reputation for being rarer than other figures.  This is a function of the Silver Pads version.  But, photos with this original Grand Slam tend to do well since people don't see him all that often.  I definitely use this guy more than this low ranking would suggest.

#09 - Breaker

Breaker was my first Joe.  It pains me to rank him this low.  But, Breaker kind of marks a point in the line where every figure from here on out is pretty strong.  I ended up ranking him lower because there's not a lot of paint on him and he lacks a firearm.  That's made up for by his strong accessories, though.  His communications headset might be my favorite single accessory from the original 13.  And, it was a staple of my Joe world: even long after Breaker had fallen apart.  He's a mainstay in my HQ: helming the computer console.  And, I even use him as the second passenger in the VAMP.  Breaker remains a nostalgic favorite.  And, his low rank is just indicative of how strong the first wave of Joes was.

#08 - Snake Eyes

Yeah, I get it.  The "all black" was a design choice.  But, it's also limiting on this figure.  And, the 1997 and later repaints that added just one or two paint applications showed that just a little bit of color would break this guy up and make for a better figure.  But, Snake Eyes also features some unique parts.  The bomb on his leg is a feature that's really ignored and speaks to the figure's intentions of being a commando instead of a super human ninja.  His gear was also pretty strong.  The Uzi is synonymous with Snake Eyes and remains a mainstay of the character to this day.  There is something about the all black appearance of the original design that is lost when you paint up some details.  But, were this figure not super popular and somewhat expensive, he'd have little reason to be used over the later repaints of this mold.

#07 - Zap

My youngest brother got a Zap when he went to visit my grandparents in early 1983.  Before the figure came home, both Zap's thumbs were broken.  So, Zap wasn't a part of our childhood collection.  But, he's a figure whose importance grew as an adult collector.  Very early on in my collecting journey, I got obsessed over Zap.  So, he was among the only early figures I sought out to add to my collection in 1999-2000.  He didn't disappoint.  His unique color and strong gear add up to a fun figure.  Were mine not suffering from a snapped o-ring and stuck back screw, I'd use him in photos much more often.  No later homage to this original Zap was able to live up to this original version. (Though, the Super Sonic Fighters Zap is among the better character upgrades Hasbro ever did.)  The swivel arm version remains expensive due to the ubiquity of snapped thumbs.  But, he's worth having around.

#06 - Steeler

If you were missing just one of the original 13 figures back in 1982 and 1983, it was probably Steeler.  Being the driver of the line's most expensive vehicle meant he was often absent from otherwise complete collections.  Steeler features a unique chest piece.  That alone makes him useful.  But, he's also a great match for the Mauler and Slugger, giving him some versatility among later vehicles that was often lacking from his contemporaries.  His binocular helmet attachment was neat and gave him more visual distinction.  And, he even included an Uzi, something also unique to him as a vehicle driver.  I use Steeler more than most of the other original 13 figures.  Though, that's also because I have a spare that's easily accessible.  But, he's deserving of his spot.

#05 - Scarlett

Scarlett's a tough one.  From a sheer design standpoint, she might be the second best figure in the original lineup.  Her sculpt is amazingly detailed.  And, that's often glossed over.  Her unique color really stood out among the sea of Green that was the original wave.  And, it allowed her to evolve with the line and remain complementary with figures that were released years later.  It's tough to find a Scarlett that hasn't discolored.  And, that really limits her.  And, the 2003 repaint of this mold was better.  Even the 1997 is strong, though, it's very different from the 1982 coloring.  So, her lower ranking here is a function of those later figures being more interesting than the first design.

#04 - Clutch

Clutch was my favorite Joe right from the get go.  His unique chest with the holstered pistol was a drawing point.  I gave him a visor, Stalker's gun and Grunt's backpack to make him the most badass fighter the Joes would ever see.  Years later, even a straight arm Clutch retained relevance in my collection because he was so well done.  He's at home when he's behind the wheel of any early Joe vehicle.  And, you can use him sans vehicle as well.  I still refer to this head sculpt as the "Clutch" head as I feel he owned the design the best and made it his own.

#03 - Stalker

Stalker stands out due to his cammo pattern.  It was a unique look among the original figures.  And, it gave him depth beyond the reuse of the standard grenade and knife torso.  His head also featured a sculpted head covering with his green beret.  It made the figure a quick favorite.  The prominence of the character in the comic helped hold him over and made Stalker among the more popular characters in the line.  Stalker had a ton of great character updates.  (I'll maintain the '89 Stalker is one of the best updates any character ever got.)  But, none of them treaded over this original version.  Even today, an original Stalker can intermingle with figures from all years and not look out of place.  I wish the Comic Pack versions had been better.  But, we have the 1997 figure, which might be even better than the 1983.  Any way you look at it, though, the combo of figure and character puts Stalker near the top.

#02 - Flash

Flash is the best designed figure of the original 13.  He features a nice shade of green on his base layer.  He is then accentuated by a brilliant red chest, leg and arm pads.  These give him a startling appearance among his peers.  Were that not enough, though, the entirety of the red is outlined by a silver trim.  All of these colors carry over to his back, too.  In short, the sculpting was miles ahead of what other toy lines were doing.  And, then, Hasbro gave us the real kicker: his accessories.  Flash got the standard helmet.  But, you really get the impression that the standard clear visor was actually designed for Flash first and then ported to other figures.  His backpack is an intricate mess of technology.  And, it all culminates in a laser rifle that can plug into the pack.  The combo of sculpting, color and gear makes Flash tough to beat.  In fact, he should be number 1.  But, he's beat out for one simple reason that you'll see next.

#01 - Rock and Roll

Rock and Roll isn't the best figure among the original 13.  But, he's the one I use the most.  Part of it is that his simplicity works for his specialty.  But, he also features a unique torso and an amazing weapon.  I happen like the character, too.  I remember Rock and Roll as the crazed madman from "Hot Potato" in the first issue of the comic.  But, he later became a bit more mellow.  And, this made him interesting.  He was supposed to be "replaced" by Roadblock.  But, he stayed on the team and remained an integral part of the story until the very end.  The gold bullets really make Rock and Roll stand out.  And, it gives him more bulk, even if he's the same size as the rest of his friends.  I use this figure constantly.  I bought a spare just so I could use him more often.  It happened to the mail away version, which was a nice surprise.  (Things like that used to happen all the time.)  So, Rock and Roll gets my top spot just because he's a guy who resonates with me and gets used all the time.  It's no more complicated than that.

So, there you have it.  That's my ranking of the first 13 G.I. Joe figures.  What are you thoughts?  The great theme of the Joe line is that was designed to appeal to every kid.  So, different parts grabbed then attention of different kids as the time.  I have plans to continue this series.  It won't be chronological.  But, you'll see them pop up and we can discuss some of the different years and how the figures stack up.

To Be Clear

To make this crystal clear to everyone.  If you're a bigot, this blog isn't for you.  Leave and don't come back.  You are not welcome here.

If you can't take the mildest of critiques of failed policy and see the societal harm they caused, you really need to look in the mirror and ask yourself why.  The answer is going to scare you.  But, it might allow you to become a better person.

The world has taken a dark turn in the last decade.  And, you all know the reason why.  Rather than fight it, a vocal third of this country has allowed themselves to embrace the hatred.  It's easy.  And, it makes it so you don't have to face your own shortcomings and failures that kept you from reaching your dreams.

Beating up on marginalized communities might make you feel better.  But, it makes you a bad person.  No rationalizations that you've adopted in your mind take away from the fact that you are just terrible.  

The time for "rational discourse" is long over.  The ideas of fascism and white supremacy were defeated in 1865, 1945 and many other times in history.  They will lose again and you will have to face up to the reality that you were duped by people who don't care about you.

Losers who use language like "woke" as a pejorative are only calling out that I said something that made them uncomfortable in their bigotry and hatred.  GOOD!  You should be uncomfortable.  And, I'm not going to avoid saying things that make you feel that way.

So, go back to your AI-slop memes on Facebook where you belong.  The rest of us are going to continue to have a good time and enjoy ourselves...while occasionally laughing at your pathetic existence. 

The Top 10 - 2025

This is my 10th Top 10.  We look back at an interesting year in Joe.  Hasbro abandoned 3 3/4" figures entirely.  But, Super7 picked up the mantle and delivered the largest contingent of figures we've seen since the heyday of the repaint era.  Sadly, the ReAction+ figures are expensive.  And, their heavy cartoon focus falls outside of my main interest.  So, while they are the real story of 2025 from a Joe perspective, they have little bearing on my past year.  The same is true of Black Major and Lady Jaye Toys.  They've done some amazing stuff this year, really upping their game.  But, for many reasons, they're products haven't spoken to me.  And, I've avoided new acquisitions from them.  And, lastly, kickstarters have come and gone.  Many haven't been funded.  And, some that have continue to underwhelm when the final product is in hand.  Again, I'm not interested in tacti-cool self insert characters that use Joe articulation but have no other connection to the Joe brand.  

I remain in a Joe acquisition moratorium.  It's just pure lack of interest.  I haven't bought anything in two years.  And, that's lead to some isolation.  If you're not talking about the newest and upcoming, you're just shouting into the void.  I don't really see my collection growing in 2026, either.  I'm just at a point where nothing's compelling enough to get me to buy it.

The most popular items on the site in 2025 was kind of weird.  It seems that unappreciated figures did really well.  You'll see from the list that some of the figures aren't the type of thing that you'd think people would want to read about.  But, I suspect that their relatively low place in the Joe world actually makes them interesting these days.  Everyone's read about Snake Eyes and see his figures everywhere.  But, Skidmark?  Only a special kind of sadist would write a few hundred words about him.  And, that drew people in.

So, here's the top 10 for 2025:

10. 2018 Red Laser Army Redmack - 654 page views

Factory Customs tend to do well.  Though, they aren't the guaranteed hits they used to be.  Redmack has the cachet of being a rare character that's now attainable.  He's visually interesting and still not all that common to see in the Joe content of the day.

09.  1990 Laser Viper - 663 page views

I've really struggled to find words for the 1990 Laser Viper.  My first profile on him wasn't great.  And, this 2nd one still wasn't quite where I wanted it to be.  But, I had fun taking photos of him out in the ice and snow.  And, he ended up in the top 10.  So, that's not too bad.  

08.  Swampmasher - 665 page views

I wish I had more Joe vehicles.  But, then, I have to pack up my collection and I see all the boxes and I think I should sell 2/3 of the ones I do have.  Some day, I'm going to get settled into a house that I live in for more than 3 or 4 years.  Maybe, then, I'll be able to get all my vehicles out and expand my collection a bit.  Vehicle prices have come down in recent years.  But, it's getting harder to find mint and complete versions as the plastic ages.  So, no guarantees, even if I have grandiose plans.

07. 1986 Stun - 679 page views

Vehicles always do well.  While figures are documented to death, Joe vehicles remain something that is less often seen.  They're big, bulky and a pain to get out.  But, they add so much to a photo.  The STUN was a childhood favorite.  And, it was fun to reminisce about it.

06. 2005 Winter Operations Frostbite - 687 page views

Snow photos did really well in 2025.  The 1993 Iceberg came in at #11 on the list.  And, some other profiles that featured photos in the snow also did well.  We got a massive snowfall early in the year and it lingered for quite some time.  So, I got hundreds of photos out in it to replenish my well of content.  On top of that, the Winter Operations is an obscure 2005 release.  (We'll see that theme appear again, later.)  Not many collectors pay it much mind.  So, this figure was a curiosity for many who couldn't place the figure without a visual reminder.

05. 1993 Alley Viper - 751 page views

This was a profile I did in conjunction with the Attica Gazette.  This bumblebee colored Alley Viper is more popular than it should be.  He's a fun army builder and is true to the Alley Viper character.  It all added up to a solid showing for a major character in one of his less famous color schemes.

04. 2025 Pythona - 798 page views

I don't know if I'll get a Pythona figure.  My local Target stopped stocking ReAction+ Joes over the summer.  She's the type of release that Super7 does well.  But, $25 is a lot to swallow for a character to whom I have no attachment.  But, she's, exactly, the type of figure that should appear in the ReAction+ line.  Super7's been mediocre with their figure assortments this year.  I hope they move away from the cartoon heavy influence.  But, I suspect they wanted to ensure that the owner got every figure he wanted as a kid before the line gets cancelled.  Now that they've hit the main characters, I'm hoping they delve into more ephemera like they did in the 5 POA line. 

03. 2005 Heavy Assault Set Duke - 811 page views

Ummm...I have no idea?  This is not a good figure.  But, the circumstances around the HAS set's release have been mostly forgotten.  You simply don't see the HAS figures used at all these days.  I suspect that obscurity lead to curiosity as it's not a figure you see all that often.  And, hard as it is to believe, this Duke is also 20 years old, now.  I'd have never guessed this was a top 3 profile of the year.  But, still not the biggest surprise on the list.

02. 1988 Skidmark - 834 page views

The biggest surprise goes to Skidmark.  He's the number 2 most viewed post of the year.  Which, makes little sense.  As mentioned above, though, I suspect that Skidmark's lack of popularity actually makes him more click-worthy.  You always see the big characters and rare figures out there.  You don't see Skidmark.  He's something new.  And, that brought in the eyeballs.

01. My Favorite Accessories Part 1 - 855 page views

This was my personal favorite piece of the year.  It gave me a chance to talk about some of the key weapons from my childhood and the stories associated with them.  Later installments of this series also did very well and fell in the top 20.  So, it's a subject that resonated with people.  I'll have some more of these coming in 2026, too.

So, that wraps up 2025.  I hope your year was good.  2026 will be fun.  I'm going to revisit some of the earliest figures profiled on the site and see how my views have changed in 25 years.  I've got more essays about some of the aspects of the line that really appealed to me back when I was a kid.  Rarities Month will be back with some obscure and interesting stuff, too.  I'm holding out hope that Super7 will reach bottom of the cartoon well and we might finally see a Dr. Venom or the khaki Kwinn figure.  Until then, have a great year!

My Least Favorite Accessories

The Joe line is nothing but a string of classic, amazing toys.  There isn't a year of the vintage line that doesn't have a treasure or two.  And, frankly, the same is true of the repaint era.  But, mingled among the awesomeness of the designs are some duds.  And, they start from very early on.  So, this time around, I'll be looking at my least favorite accessories from the Joe line.  To be fair, I'm going to limit some of the JvC era weapons and gear.  Because, that time frame did get a lot wrong.  And, you'll see that some of my dislike of vintage weapons was reinforced and even augmented by those weapons overuse in the 2000's.  

1984 Baroness Rifle

So, I've disliked the Baroness' rifle since 1984.  When my younger brother got her in the early part of that year at a Value City Department store (I got Firefly!), I didn't know much about the character.  But, they had three new figures and he chose the Baroness over Roadlock.  (My youngest brother got Roadblock.)  When we got the figures home, Firefly's amazing gear amplified one of the best figures in the line.  Roadblock's gear was an amazing feat of engineering that magnified an otherwise mundane figure into an all time classic.  And Baroness' gear...well...it sucked.  Her overly large rifle simply didn't work.  And, it was just that it wouldn't fit with the slightly smaller female form used for the Baroness.  It didn't fit any other figure, either.  From the small handle to the oversized stock, the gun was simply not one that worked well with any figure.  And, when you contrast this to how amazing the rifle looked on the Baroness cart art, it was impossible to reconcile the differences.  What should have been awesome was just worthless in actual plastic form.  And, when the comparisons that circumstances dictated would be against Firefly and Roadblock gear: Baroness' rifle simply stood no chance.

As her gun wasn't up to snuff, the Baroness figure fell to a similar fate in my collection.  Back in the mid 1980's, it wasn't common to have extra accessories lying around.  So, it wasn't like I could give the figure a spare Destro pistol.  Battle Gear did help this...to a point.  But, I never liked the pairing of the blue pistols from the 1984 Battle Gear set with the all black Baroness figure.  Plus, since her rifle stretched out her hands, she couldn't even hold the Destro pistol.  So, the Baroness became an afterthought.

Fast forward to the repaint era.  The first two uses of the Baroness mold included her classic weapon.  And, I'm OK with this.  While the rifle sucks, it was iconic to the Baroness.  So, including it with her wasn't terrible.  The softer plastic of the 1997 and later figures also allowed the figures to better hold the weapon.  So, it had a slight redemption arc.  But, then, inexplicably, Hasbro fell in love with the rifle and started including it with many other figures.  The worst example of this was the Viper figures in Waves 1.5, 2 and 7.75.  People army built these Vipers en masse.  And, they were stuck with terrible, terrible weapons that didn't really work with the figure and weren't even close approximations of the Viper's classic weapon's look.  

And, I ended up with dozens of rifles that were useless.  When you take something you dislike and circumstances dictate you acquire an absurd, additional among of that something...well...that dislike to turns to spite and then outright hatred.  So, there's no salvation for the Baroness' rifle.  It's going to hold my least liked accessory spot until the bitter, bitter end.

1982 Grunt M-16

What!  Yes, I know this is an affront to the very essence of the Joe line.  But, I've never been overly fond of the original M-16 that came with Grunt.  From the beginning, it was a thumb breaker with a thick, round handle and a short, fat stock.  It was, easily, my least favorite accessory from the original 13 figures.  And, time hasn't been kind to it at all.  

My biggest example of why Grunt's gun sucks is that in 1985, Hasbro made a far better M-16 that was included with Footloose.  This weapon was everything the original rifle was not.  And, it forever rendered Grunt's weapon obsolete.  Grunt's M-16 can really only be used by 1982 and 1983 figures.  Anything released after that is just out of scale for the accessory.  If you think about the timeframe, the M-16 should have been the de facto standard for all G.I. Joe figures.  Instead, this role fell to Snow Job's XMLR.  The original M-16 just didn't work well with figures.  Grunt gets a bit of pass since it was his.  But, when you realize how good all the original figures look with Stalker's M-32, the limitations of the M-16 become even more apparent.  I've never gone out of my way to pick up spare copies of this accessory like I have for every other weapon released with the original 13 figures.  It just isn't something I find value in.

1988 Voltar's gun:

I very much dislike this weapon.  It's not the gold color.  Instead, it's just the overall design.  And, the fact that it can't decide if it's a pistol or a rifle.  In general, I'm not a fan of larger weapons that lack stocks.  They are hard for the figures to hold.  And, they always pose awkwardly.  As a kid, I wanted to like Voltar's weapon because it was new.  But, as I was older and out of Joes when my brother brought it home, my critical eye was more fine tuned.  And, the weapon never clicked with me.

In the 1990's, the weapon found tons of reuse on various weapon trees.  It was always a disappointment to get a cool, new figure and find out one of his weapons was from Voltar.  In fact, I have quite a few trees (or, I did, until the dog ate them!!!) where the Voltar weapon was still attached even after I had removed all the other accessories.  I simply didn't care for the weapon and would rather have old, beat up figures with no weapons than take the time to give them the spare Voltar weapons that I had on the trees.  I loathe the weapon to this day and don't use it with any of the 1990's army builders who included it among their gear complement.  It always looks weird and detracts from any figure holding it.

1991 Grunt Rifle

Hmmm, Grunt appears twice in this list.  I wonder if there's something there in my subconscious about the character.  Or, if Hasbro just misfired on his various weapons.  It's probably not Grunt, though.  As, my introduction to this weapon was on the 1993 and 1994 weapon trees that I tracked down in the mid 1990's.  At the time, I loved the "new" weapons that I found on these trees.  Having missed most of the 1988-1992 Joes, all of his gear seemed like it was newly designed for the figures with which it was included.  There were so many good weapons.  But, this overly large weapon that had debuted with the 1991 Grunt was not one of them.  It was too large, difficult for figures to hold in cool ways and just a blocky, uninteresting design.  I loved having overly powered weapons during this time.  But, I could never reconcile this Grunt gun.  And, it seemed like every 1993 figure I bought included it.  So, I had a ton of them and couldn't use them.

This weapon's appearance also made me realize that one of the reasons why I had this weapon and Voltar's weapon so much was because they were so ubiquitous in my mid 1990's purchases.  At the time, the extra weapons from the trees were appreciated because I had a shoebox of dingy figures who lacked accessories.  The trees solved for that.  But, when I got duds like this Grunt rifle, it was a wasted slot and my older beaters couldn't be weaponized for use against my new acquisitions.

2003 Chief Torpedo Rifle

Be honest...you had no idea what rifle was even included with this figure until you went to the photos below.  And, in full transparency, I'm not 100% sure if the weapon actually debuted with this Torpedo figure.  I didn't want to expend the energy to be certain.  It was included with a ton of  figures in the 2000's and is available in a multitude of colors  Regardless, I despise this weapon.  The reasons, though, are more nuanced.

At its core, this weapon, actually, isn't bad.  The detailing is amazing.  The scale is right on: even for vintage figures.  It's a rifle/grenade launcher combo without being too overt.  In short, it should be great.  And, that's what makes it so maddening.  This was one of Hasbro's best efforts on newly designed weapons through 2003.  But, it had a fatal flaw that rendered it useless.  It didn't have a stock that allowed for a figure to actually hold it.  So, every time you want to use it, it flops around in the figure's hands.  And, the end result is just a ridiculous looking pose where the weapons is about to fall to the ground.

So, you got this amazingly sculpted, new weapon that was included with a ton of figures, but had no practical uses at all.  To this day, I cringe when I see this weapon  being used with figures.  It just looks so out of place.  I look back at that era and wonder what might have been.  Imagine the Neo-Viper's AK-47(ish) rifle, but with the level of sculpting and detail you see on this Chief Torpedo gun.  It might have competed for the best accessory in the line.  But, that wasn't meant to be.  There are some decent accessories from the JvC era.  But, this wasn't one of them.

Honorable Mentions:

1985 Tomax and Xamot pistol

The 2000's lead me to despise this weapon.  The pistol is comically large, doesn't look good with most figures and is out of scale for the figures with which it was always included.  But, you know who it does work perfectly with?  Tomax and Xamot.  As a kid, I loved this weapon for them.  I would only use it with them and they would only use  it.  To this day, Tomax and Xamot occupy a place in my display case: both with raised pistols to show them off.  So, you can't really have the Crimson Twins without the pistol.  And, I love it for them.  But, I HATE it for any other figure.

1990 SAW Viper Rifle

We now know that Hasbro screwed up the scale on this weapon.  And, it was not intended to be as large as it was.  It's still terrible.  And, there's really no redeeming it.  But, at least it was a production screw up instead of an intentional design.  Again, though, this weapon is made worse by the differences between it and the portrayal of the SAW Viper in various media.  In the comic, the SAW Viper loomed large for about a year.  He was always drawn  with more realistic weapons that made him look like a bad ass.  While the figure doesn't quite live up the comic image, either, the weapon included with the figure is a colossal  letdown.  Even in a smaller scale, it just  didn't live up to the visuals from the comic.  Fortunately, much better machine guns did come out, later.  So, if you can find some of those, they are a drastic improvement for the SAW Viper.

2004 Comic Pack Hawk Pistol

If you look at my list of favorite accessories, you'll see it's dominated by smaller pistols.  There was something about the delicate nature of such a small piece that captivated me.  In the 2000's, Hasbro introduced working holsters to the Joe line.  It was a concept I'd wanted since I was a kid.  Some of them worked great.  Others...didn't.  But, Hasbro did make a nice armory of new pistols.  Sadly, though, this 2004 version didn't work out so well.  It looks great.  But, the handle is just too big for figure's to use.  It will break vintage thumbs and stretch out repaint era figures.  The worst thing about it, though, is its legacy.  This pistol lead to factory custom makers using similar designs.  Instead of redoing something cool like the 1986 Hawk or 1987 Chuckles pistol, they reused large handled designs from the 2000's.  And, none of them can be used with the figures.  I have a bin full of these pistols that will either snap the thumb or simple not go into the hands of factory customs.  The weapons look good when they're lying around.  But, they are useless.

Before the end of the year, I'll wrap my favorite accessories.  The last entry includes some doozies.  In the meantime, let me know what weapons you hated.  You know you have them.  So, vent away.