The Rankings - 1983 Original 13

Everybody loves rankings, right?  There's no better way to start a pointless argument than to rank items that hold unique, special places to each collector.  Once upon a time, I tried to write up a completely objective ranking of the original 13 Joe figures.  But, even with the stated goal of erasing childhood nostalgia from the equation, the list was pretty much my personal favorites with a few guys bumped up a spot or two.  So, why bother with any of that pretext?  Instead, I'm going with a straight ranking of my favorite figures: starting with the original 13.  I'm only using swivel arm versions as I don't collect straight arms.  And, I'll do the "new" 1983 figures some other time.  I'm not sure I'll get to every year because I'll get bored of it long before I would ever endeavor to slog through all the 1993 releases.  But, I'm going to start with the year that's sure to elicit some opinions.  

The thing is, there are no wrong opinions about these figures.  If Short Fuse holds dear, core memories for you, that's a story worth telling in the comments.  The point of this isn't to challenge your beliefs.  Instead, it's to memorialize mine and prompt a modicum of discussion.  So, on with the show....

#13 - Short Fuse

I just can't get into Short Fuse.  He was never a player in my collection.  He didn't have much of a characterization in the comic other than being an annoying hot head.  And, his weapon wasn't conducive to childhood play.  But, really, he's kind of boring.  His chests harness isn't the greatest design.  But, he's also in a green that's similar to other figures.  So, you don't really feel like you're getting anything special with this figure.  Zap is a better use of the mold.  Hawk is a better use of the head.  I know we had one when I was a kid.  But, mostly, I remember him from the fact that I noticed his mortar mold changed and it was also knocked off by, I think, Galoob for some of their action figure lines.  That's not much of a legacy.

#12 - Grunt

I'm not a Grunt fan.  Never have been.  I've always found him to be boring.  To be fair, I missed the silver knife on his chest...a feature that captivated me when we got a Tan Grunt in 1983.  But, I still see this guy as just a basic infantryman.  His M-16 never clicked with me, either.  It broke thumbs in 1982.  I did love his backpack.  I gave it to Clutch so I didn't waste it on Grunt.  There's not much too him and he lacks the skills to really set himself apart from his more specialized team mates.  At some point in late 1982 or early 1983, we buried a bunch of Joes behind some bricks that lined the stairs up the hill in our front yard.  I remember pulling a well worn Grunt and Stalker out of the space a few years later.  That's about the extent of his use.  He and Short Fuse remain my least used figures of the original series of Joes.

#11 - Hawk

Let's face two facts.  Visually, Grunt is a better figure than Hawk.  And, the debut figure of Joe's leader kind of sucks.  But, I give Hawk the edge over Grunt due to the silver trim dominating the figure.  It gives him a more commanding presence.  And, the over abundance of silver does give Hawk a defining look.  There's not much else going on here, though.  So, he ranks pretty low.  I snapped the thumb of my 1982 Hawk when I tried to give him a Battle Gear M-16.  After that, the character disappeared until the amazing 1986 upgrade came around.  Hawk looks good.  But, if I want to use Hawk, I'll almost never choose this figure.

#10 - Grand Slam

Grand Slam and Flash  share the same mold.  The darker green on Grand Slam is a definite downgrade over the brighter green that Flash uses.  As a kid, we only had a straight arm Grand Slam.  The Silver Pads version was my Grand Slam.  I used him as a derivative of Flash, though.  The lack of accessories drops Grand Slam down a bit.  But, this figure does get a lot more use from me now.  Mostly, that's due to the fact that Grand Slam has remained pretty obscure over the years.  And, he's a guy who holds a certain, undeserved reputation for being rarer than other figures.  This is a function of the Silver Pads version.  But, photos with this original Grand Slam tend to do well since people don't see him all that often.  I definitely use this guy more than this low ranking would suggest.

#09 - Breaker

Breaker was my first Joe.  It pains me to rank him this low.  But, Breaker kind of marks a point in the line where every figure from here on out is pretty strong.  I ended up ranking him lower because there's not a lot of paint on him and he lacks a firearm.  That's made up for by his strong accessories, though.  His communications headset might be my favorite single accessory from the original 13.  And, it was a staple of my Joe world: even long after Breaker had fallen apart.  He's a mainstay in my HQ: helming the computer console.  And, I even use him as the second passenger in the VAMP.  Breaker remains a nostalgic favorite.  And, his low rank is just indicative of how strong the first wave of Joes was.

#08 - Snake Eyes

Yeah, I get it.  The "all black" was a design choice.  But, it's also limiting on this figure.  And, the 1997 and later repaints that added just one or two paint applications showed that just a little bit of color would break this guy up and make for a better figure.  But, Snake Eyes also features some unique parts.  The bomb on his leg is a feature that's really ignored and speaks to the figure's intentions of being a commando instead of a super human ninja.  His gear was also pretty strong.  The Uzi is synonymous with Snake Eyes and remains a mainstay of the character to this day.  There is something about the all black appearance of the original design that is lost when you paint up some details.  But, were this figure not super popular and somewhat expensive, he'd have little reason to be used over the later repaints of this mold.

#07 - Zap

My youngest brother got a Zap when he went to visit my grandparents in early 1983.  Before the figure came home, both Zap's thumbs were broken.  So, Zap wasn't a part of our childhood collection.  But, he's a figure whose importance grew as an adult collector.  Very early on in my collecting journey, I got obsessed over Zap.  So, he was among the only early figures I sought out to add to my collection in 1999-2000.  He didn't disappoint.  His unique color and strong gear add up to a fun figure.  Were mine not suffering from a snapped o-ring and stuck back screw, I'd use him in photos much more often.  No later homage to this original Zap was able to live up to this original version. (Though, the Super Sonic Fighters Zap is among the better character upgrades Hasbro ever did.)  The swivel arm version remains expensive due to the ubiquity of snapped thumbs.  But, he's worth having around.

#06 - Steeler

If you were missing just one of the original 13 figures back in 1982 and 1983, it was probably Steeler.  Being the driver of the line's most expensive vehicle meant he was often absent from otherwise complete collections.  Steeler features a unique chest piece.  That alone makes him useful.  But, he's also a great match for the Mauler and Slugger, giving him some versatility among later vehicles that was often lacking from his contemporaries.  His binocular helmet attachment was neat and gave him more visual distinction.  And, he even included an Uzi, something also unique to him as a vehicle driver.  I use Steeler more than most of the other original 13 figures.  Though, that's also because I have a spare that's easily accessible.  But, he's deserving of his spot.

#05 - Scarlett

Scarlett's a tough one.  From a sheer design standpoint, she might be the second best figure in the original lineup.  Her sculpt is amazingly detailed.  And, that's often glossed over.  Her unique color really stood out among the sea of Green that was the original wave.  And, it allowed her to evolve with the line and remain complementary with figures that were released years later.  It's tough to find a Scarlett that hasn't discolored.  And, that really limits her.  And, the 2003 repaint of this mold was better.  Even the 1997 is strong, though, it's very different from the 1982 coloring.  So, her lower ranking here is a function of those later figures being more interesting than the first design.

#04 - Clutch

Clutch was my favorite Joe right from the get go.  His unique chest with the holstered pistol was a drawing point.  I gave him a visor, Stalker's gun and Grunt's backpack to make him the most badass fighter the Joes would ever see.  Years later, even a straight arm Clutch retained relevance in my collection because he was so well done.  He's at home when he's behind the wheel of any early Joe vehicle.  And, you can use him sans vehicle as well.  I still refer to this head sculpt as the "Clutch" head as I feel he owned the design the best and made it his own.

#03 - Stalker

Stalker stands out due to his cammo pattern.  It was a unique look among the original figures.  And, it gave him depth beyond the reuse of the standard grenade and knife torso.  His head also featured a sculpted head covering with his green beret.  It made the figure a quick favorite.  The prominence of the character in the comic helped hold him over and made Stalker among the more popular characters in the line.  Stalker had a ton of great character updates.  (I'll maintain the '89 Stalker is one of the best updates any character ever got.)  But, none of them treaded over this original version.  Even today, an original Stalker can intermingle with figures from all years and not look out of place.  I wish the Comic Pack versions had been better.  But, we have the 1997 figure, which might be even better than the 1983.  Any way you look at it, though, the combo of figure and character puts Stalker near the top.

#02 - Flash

Flash is the best designed figure of the original 13.  He features a nice shade of green on his base layer.  He is then accentuated by a brilliant red chest, leg and arm pads.  These give him a startling appearance among his peers.  Were that not enough, though, the entirety of the red is outlined by a silver trim.  All of these colors carry over to his back, too.  In short, the sculpting was miles ahead of what other toy lines were doing.  And, then, Hasbro gave us the real kicker: his accessories.  Flash got the standard helmet.  But, you really get the impression that the standard clear visor was actually designed for Flash first and then ported to other figures.  His backpack is an intricate mess of technology.  And, it all culminates in a laser rifle that can plug into the pack.  The combo of sculpting, color and gear makes Flash tough to beat.  In fact, he should be number 1.  But, he's beat out for one simple reason that you'll see next.

#01 - Rock and Roll

Rock and Roll isn't the best figure among the original 13.  But, he's the one I use the most.  Part of it is that his simplicity works for his specialty.  But, he also features a unique torso and an amazing weapon.  I happen like the character, too.  I remember Rock and Roll as the crazed madman from "Hot Potato" in the first issue of the comic.  But, he later became a bit more mellow.  And, this made him interesting.  He was supposed to be "replaced" by Roadblock.  But, he stayed on the team and remained an integral part of the story until the very end.  The gold bullets really make Rock and Roll stand out.  And, it gives him more bulk, even if he's the same size as the rest of his friends.  I use this figure constantly.  I bought a spare just so I could use him more often.  It happened to the mail away version, which was a nice surprise.  (Things like that used to happen all the time.)  So, Rock and Roll gets my top spot just because he's a guy who resonates with me and gets used all the time.  It's no more complicated than that.

So, there you have it.  That's my ranking of the first 13 G.I. Joe figures.  What are you thoughts?  The great theme of the Joe line is that was designed to appeal to every kid.  So, different parts grabbed then attention of different kids as the time.  I have plans to continue this series.  It won't be chronological.  But, you'll see them pop up and we can discuss some of the different years and how the figures stack up.

1983 Snake Eyes - Around the Web

It's tough to find things to say about the 1983 Snake Eyes that haven't already been said hundreds of times.  He's the most iconic member of the original 13.  And, he was one of the most distinctive action figures released during his heyday.  Hasbro released at least half a dozen repaints of this mold.  And, every iteration of Joe since the vintage line has had a Snake Eyes figure based on this original appearance.  Factory custom makers have exploited the mold for dozens of different homages.  And, there are foreign variants from Europe, South America and India.

There's more content on this figure out there than is listed below.  But, I just went with some of my favorites from recent years.  It's tough to imagine that a the majority of the photos of figures like this Snake Eyes are lost to internet history.  But, there's enough left to enjoy if you like this look for the character.  So, check out the links below and let the creators know you stopped by.

1983 Snake Eyes Profile

Red Backed Snake Eyes

1983 Snake Eyes by DreadnokDread

1983 Snake Eyes by mikesjoetography

1983 Snake Eyes by 00zxcvb

1983 Snake Eyes be Relinqueshed1979

1983 Snake Eyes by yojoe_collectibles

1983 Snake Eyes by incrediblebulk

1983 Snake Eyes by DreadnokDread

1983 Snake Eyes by still_a_big_kid

1983 Snake Eyes by darkstar_vintage

1983 Dragonfly - Around The Web

It's tough to beat the Dragonfly.  It's a drastically superior toy to the over-rated Skystriker.  And, even after 11 years of additional releases, the Dragonfly held up and remained a necessary element of any collection.  It both displays well and doesn't take up a ton of space.  It has a lot of details and features that give it depth that makes it visually interesting.  And, it works perfectly with the figures from that era.

There's plenty  of content on the Dragonfly out there.  So, stop by all the links below and check it out.

1983 Dragonfly Profile

1983 Dragonfly by cyko_9

1983 Dragonfly by cobra_florence

1983 Dragonfly by jonita_rodriguin

1983 Dragonfly by darkstar_vintage

1983 Dragonfly by gen_liederkranz

1983 Dragonfly by thedustinmccoy

1983 Dragonfly by codename.steve

1983 Dragonfly by still_a_big_kid

1983 Dragonfly by littlegreenmentoyz

1983 Dragonfly by Evilface

1983 Clutch

It's really difficult to comprehend just how innovative the original Joe line was as a retail product.  It's not just the quality of the toys that stands out.  But, the manner in which the design team packaged and priced the toys was nothing short of novel.  One of the most compelling innovations was the inclusion of exclusive vehicle drivers in their vehicles.  I'm not sure if G.I. Joe was the first brand to do such a thing.  But, Kenner had not done it for Star Wars...instead opting to sell all figures individually.  Hasbro, though, created a slew of exclusive figures to operate their vehicles.  And, if you wanted Hawk, Grand Slam, Steeler or Clutch, you had to buy a vehicle to get them.  While the figures shared parts with carded figures it was Steeler and Clutch who featured original chest pieces that were not available anywhere other than on the vehicle drivers.

My affinity for Clutch began on the very first day that I saw a G.I. Joe figure in hand.  It was my younger brother's birthday in October of 1982.  On that day, he got an amazing amount of figures and vehicles...including some doubles.  On that day, I learned that Joe gear was compatible across figures.  And, very quickly, I took Grunt's backpack, Stalker's gun and a visor from, probably, Grand Slam and gave it all to Clutch.  I now had the ultimate figure.  I used this supercharged Clutch as my go-to figure for several weeks.  Finally, at Christmas, I opened my very own VAMP that was under the tree and I had a Clutch to call my own.  

That figure, though, didn't last too long.  Not because of breakage.  But, because Return of the Jedi toys appeared in the spring of 1983.  Joe was dropped in favor of my long running Star War obsession.  In July of 1983, though, I discovered the new addition of swivel arm battle grip.  This opened a whole new world to me.  And, with that one little change, Star Wars was forever second fiddle to Joe in our house.  But, this also meant that any straight armed Joes were relegated to a junk box.  But, this didn't really hold true for Clutch.  Since he was a vehicle driver, I could still make him work as the driver of the VAMP.  So, he was the only straight arm to remain viable.  In fact, he still got use as late as 1987 as my childhood Joe days ended.  

One thing I didn't have, though, was a swivel arm Clutch.  If you read my first write up on this guy from January of 2000, I note that I still didn't have a swivel arm Clutch.  In all my acquisitions of the late 1990's, a swivel Clutch was never among the scores of other original 13 figures I acquired.  It was not until 2004 that one came my way.  At the time, I had joined a start up company.  There were just two of us.  We were squatting in some office space of my boss's old colleague.  As part of our agreement, I'd help out their IT guy with some issues.  He was my age and we shared many interests.  He had a Star Wars figure in his office and it opened up conversations about toys we still had.  One day, he brought in a bag full of G.I. Joe figures and playsets.  He wanted to raise a bit of cash.  So, I sold most of them for him on JoeCustoms.com.  In this baggie was a near perfect swivel arm Clutch.  I told him I was interested in it and would buy it from him.  He set it aside as I awaited some money from items I was also selling.  When, the money for his items arrived, though, he gifted me the Clutch for helping him sell the other parts.  It is the very Clutch you see in the photos below and the only one I still own today.  

When I examine why G.I. Joe toys matter so much to me, it is stories like this stand out.  The toys are a pneumonic device for me to recall events of my life.  I have great recall from my childhood.  A big part of that is because I'm able to associate memories with Joe toys.  For other people, it may be music, TV or other pop culture influences that remind them of bygone days.  For me, it's G.I. Joe toys.  Those memories also extend into my adulthood.  I don't remember sitting in that hot server room with a wire storage rack on the back wall because the networking error of the day was so compelling.  I remember it because my friend and I would talk about old toys, cartoons and comic books.  I used to get Amazon deliveries at the office.  (Amazon sold inventory for Toys R Us, back then.)  With each box, we'd look at the items and recall childhood memories from the various repainted figures.  That was over 20 years ago.  But, the memories are vivid because of their association with Joe and Star Wars.

Among my childhood friend group, Clutch was the most memorable character.  I have a friend who can still recite the final stanza of Clutch's filecard.  It was that impactful.  Clutch's popularity was a function of him being the driver of the most popular and coolest vehicle from 1982, the most distinctive figure and a really fun character from the comic.  Clutch is also the closest of the vintage figures to the iconic "G.I. Joe" from the '60's.  The bearded head was an obvious homage to the guy who started it all.  But, Clutch's black hair really cemented the tribute to the line's origins.

Aside from his uniquely sculpted torso, Clutch also features some extra color on his chest.  7 of the original 13 figures featured three colors on their torso.  Clutch was one.  Aside from the black holster and green base, Clutch also has brown padding near his shoulders and protecting the zipper on his jacket.  It adds a nice layer of depth to Clutch's appearance and helps him stand out from his peers.  The color also accentuates Clutch's collar.  Most of the original Joes were wearing slight turtlenecks.  Clutch appears to be wearing a hoodie: just without the hood on the back.  It raises up to and you can see it protecting his neck since the VAMP doesn't have a windshield.  

Clutch is criminally underutilized.  He and Steeler feature the least used chest pieces of the original 13 figures.  Clutch was released in his original form in 1982 with the swivel arm update coming in 1983.  While he was originally only packaged with the VAMP, Clutch would become a mail away in later years.  Hasbro repainted him in tan as the driver of the VAMP Mark II in 1984. And, then, the mold was done as far as Hasbro was concerned.  While the VAMP travelled all over the world for exclusive uses in Europe, Japan, Mexico, Brazil and India, Clutch didn't really travel with it.  A Tan Clutch was included with the Takara VAMP.  But, there was no exclusive Clutch to accompany the South American or European VAMP releases.  In the 1990's, Clutch did appear in India, though.  He is one of the most obscure figures to get a full Funskool release.  But, he and Hawk are also the only Funskool characters to be exclusive to vehicle releases.  (All other Funskool vehicle drivers were random figures inserted into the box and not meant to be specific to their vehicle.)  There are tons of Funskool Clutch variants.  Some are great and others are pretty close to the Hasbro figure.  Clutch didn't appear after his early Funskool years, though.

This left Clutch as a forgotten mold.  And, as I'd argue that his chest piece was the best of the original figures, that seemed a shame.  For years, customizers used Clutch's chest to great effect on original designs for both Joes and Cobras.  It was not until 2018, though, that Clutch's chest would finally reappear.  Red Laser Army recreated the piece and used it on a variety of figures.  In some ways, the uses didn't create great figures.  But, in other ways, we finally got some variety that showed the piece's potential.  What we didn't get, though, was a Clutch to match all the various VAMP colors that are available.  You could have credibly created half a dozen Clutch repaints before even stealing his chest for other characters.  (Like a repainted General using his torso to match up with Hawk's appearance in G.I. Joe #16.)  Not getting a Clutch is an omission that couldn't get corrected as Red Laser lost the molds after the 2018 series and wasn't able to continue his work. 

As original 13 figures go, Clutch is surprisingly affordable.  High quality loose figures can be had for under $15.  And, mint and complete with filecard figures sell for around $25.  Clutch not having a visor or exclusive weapon really helps keep the price down.  And, the ubiquity of the figure shows just how many VAMPs Hasbro produced in the line's infancy.  The production numbers that show the volume of vehicles versus carded figures for at least the 1982 line is out there, somewhere.  It would be interesting to see how Clutch's production numbers compare to, say, Stalker or Scarlett.  But, for a major character who didn't get an iconic sculpting upgrade for a decade, it's surprising to see Clutch remain an acquirable piece for any collection.  

1983 Silver Pads Grand Slam - Around The Web

Silver Pads Grand Slam remains one of those figures who still carries an aura about him.  It's not an easy figure to find in mint condition.  And, while he's not the most important character in the Joe world, the figure transcends that and remains desirable.  As such, there's some decent content using the figure that's out there.  The striking colors and general rarity make for fun photos.  So, check them out!

Silver Pads Grand Slam Profile - 2000

Silver Pads Grand Slam Profile - 2023

1982 JUMP Profile

Silver Pads Grand Slam Mail Away Overstock

Silver Pads Grand Slam by 00zxcvb

Silver Pads Grand Slam by thedustinmccoy

Silver Pads Grand Slam by gen_liederkranz

Silver Pads Grand Slam by Night Force Tunnel Rat

Silver Pads Grand Slam by doksewage

Silver Pads Grand Slam by steelbrigade

Silver Pads Grand Slam by Night Force Tunnel Rat

Silver Pads Grand Slam by flatline54

Silver Pads Grand Slam by steelbrigade

Silver Pads Grand Slam by doksewage

Silver Pads Grand Slam by gijoe_guy

Silver Pads Grand Slam by steelbrigade

Silver Pads Grand Slam by still_a_big_kid

Silver Pads Grand Slam by evilface

Silver Pads Grand Slam by ftwten

1983 Flash - Random Photos of the Day

I've been working on something about the original 13 figures for a month or so.  I'm about 80% done.  But, that last 20% is turning into a slog.  Hopefully, I'll work through it in the next week or two.  Until then, I'm going with some random photos of the most elaborate original 13 figure: Flash.  He features amazing colors, great accessories and a complex mold.  He's the best designed of all the original figures and the most complete overall release.  He looks great in photos and can be used in a variety of settings.  So, check out some Flash pictures until I get some inspiration to work through an extended period of writer's block.

1983 Doc - Around The Web

Doc is one of those figures who is really good, especially for his purpose.  For the life of me, though, I can't ever come up with something interesting to say about him.  Maybe it's because he's kind of bland.  But, that banality works in Doc's favor since he's supposed to be a doctor.  His gear is awesome and his stretcher was always an important part of my childhood play.  At least lots of other people have been able to use him to great effect.  So, check out the 1983 Doc content that's out there.  

1983 Doc Profile

Doc by thedustinmccoy

Doc by steelbrigade

Doc by thedragonfortress

Doc by specialmissionforce

Doc by steelbrigade

Doc by Backyard Battles

Doc by nostalkid

Doc by u.n.i.t_gijoe

Doc by steelbrigade

Doc by thedustinmccoy

Doc by ussflagg

Doc by Evilface

Doc by 3rd_wave_sabotage

Doc by gi_jokers

Doc by thedustinmccoy

Doc by weregoblin

Doc by 73larebear

Doc by dawghaus_

Rarities - Mail Away 1983 Grand Slam, Hawk and Clutch

In the summer of 2001, a random seller posted a few bagged 1983 G.I. Joe figures who were packed with redback filecards.  They had a small stock of them.  They were offered at $5 and bought out instantly.  I managed to get a Clutch and Hawk, but missed out on the Grand Slam.  The seller said they had more.  But, due to the quick sell out, decided to do more research on the value of the items.  Within a few weeks, some additional bagged figures appeared.  They were higher priced, though still offered for sums that seem ridiculously cheap these days.  Some collectors bought a few.  But, mostly they sat around as the collecting world wasn't really interested in them.

Over the years, the supply of the figures never really dried up.  You could always find them.  But, there were never enough to really drop prices too far.  For a very long time, you could get the bagged versions for about the same price as a loose, mint and complete figure of the same character.  Grand Slam was usually higher priced, though, as he included the filecard from the Silver Pads Grand Slam.  And, in those early days, many collectors didn't make a distinction between the redback versions of filecards or those cut from a box.  

The reason for this is that a ton of overstock of these figures have been found.  You'll even see a "barn" find where entire cases of the figures were discovered and put into the collecting community.  During the years close to the finds, the figures would get cheap.  Now, they have gotten more expensive.  While there are plenty of them out there, they are still more scarce than standard loose figures.  And, many collectors in the early days simply opened the bags up because it was a cheaper option to get high quality vehicle drivers.

The most interesting aspect of the figures is that you get a red Grand Slam with a Silver Pads Grand Slam filecard.  The photo for the Silver Pads figure was all new and created as a JUMP exclusive when the figure was added in 1983.  So, it's not like they destroyed the original artwork.  So, the appearance of the Silver Pads art is weird.  But, it's likely that Hasbro had it more ready to go since it was newer.  As collectability goes, this filecard is the most noteworthy just because it has the juxtaposition of figure and artwork.

The reality is that these three figures are not rare.  There are tons of them out there due to the various finds over the years.  People still pay premiums for them.  But, usually, the prices for these three figures remain far below bagged samples of other 1983 mail away and catalog figures.  So, at least there's no inequity there.  Once upon a time, it was easier and about the same price to simply buy one of these bagged figures and open it to get a mint and complete with filecard figure of the three included in the set.  That's no longer the case.  

1983 Hawk - Around The Web

It's been a sparse month of profiles, so far.  Last week, my dog ate a bunch of accessories.  This week, the other dog got sprayed by a skunk.  I spent two full days getting the stink out of the house.  So, I'm digging deep into the reserves for something that's ready enough to keep the content flowing.  

Here's some 1983 Hawk content from around the web.  This figure is surprisingly popular and appears way more than I would have thought.  In fact, he's easier to find than many of the other original 13 Joe figures.  There's some good stuff here.  So, check the links and let the creators know you appreciate their work.

1983 Hawk Profile

1982 MMS Profile

1983 Hawk by joenationpete

1983 Hawk by R.T.G.

1983 Hawk by Slipstream80

1983 Hawk by Roland da Thompson Gunner

1983 Hawk at JoeADay.com

1983 Hawk by General Jones

1983 Hawk by Slipstream80

1983 Hawk by Roland da Thompson Gunner

1983 Hawk by Slipstream80

1983 Hawk by evilface

1983 Hawk by still_a_big_kid

1983 Hawk by thedustinmccoy

1983 Hawk by JoeRizzo2025

1983 Hawk by Gen_Liederkraz

Rarities - The 2023 Unproduced Lot - Mickey Mouse Cobra Trooper and Officer

In late 2023, a random Ebay lot appeared.  In it were loose versions of the unproduced alternate head Zap, Short Fuse and Breaker figures.  The figures had been played with.  But, the molds matched the known, existing samples of those three figures.  Also in the lot, though, were two other figures that had never before appeared publically: an alternate logo Cobra Trooper and Cobra Officer.

These figures feature the "Mickey Mouse" Cobra logo that appeared on  the early run Mickey Mouse Cobra Commander figure.  Up until this point, these logos had never been seen on either a Trooper or an Officer (in public).  And, the collecting community quickly went into overdrive to authenticate the figures.  

It certainly helped that the figures were found along with loose samples of the alternate head 1983 figures.  That gave them a  provenance boost since there were other items in similar condition that indicated a pre-production find.  And, those other items featured mold changes rather than the more easily faked paint differences.  The fact that the items had play wear meant that the original owner had no idea that they had anything special.

At the end  of the day, these figures aren't all that interesting.  We've seen the logo before.  And, the figure molds are the same as production releases.  Seeing the two together is notable when you put together a timeline of the design process.  The Mickey Mouse Cobra Commander, though, already gave us that information.  But, really, the Mickey Mouse Cobra logo sucks.  The logo that they went with for production is drastically superior.  So, Hasbro made the right choice with the change.  But, seeing production figures like these tells you how close this logo was to being the definitive symbol of everyone's favorite evil terrorist organization.  

The value on these figures is likely in the thousands of dollars.  Even if more of them appear (as happened with the alternate head 1983 figures after the first samples were discovered), it won't be enough to sate the high dollar demand.  Items like this don't appear all that often.  And, it's been a while since legit pre-production variants had been found on vintage Joe items.  

The fact that things like this still exist speak to the sheer volume of product that the Joe line encompasses and the fact that many people who had access to these items may not have really cared, or even noticed, that they had  something materially different from the full production items in  their possession.  It's great that there are still  finds to be made out in the world.  But, they are far more likely to be made by professional resellers who buy out old toy designer's closets and basement than actual collectors.  

Which means items like this will remain the domain  of well heeled collectors.  We can just hope that the original sales of the items continue to be in public forums so that the items in question don't get to just disappear into private collections with no documentation of their existence.  (Like the pre-existing samples of these did.  Yeah, other copies of these exist and are kept hidden for...reasons.)  So, at least we now know these figures exist: even if they aren't all that cool.

1983 Hiss Tank - Around The Web

The Hiss Tank is the single most iconic Cobra ground vehicle.  It is a staple of every collection and is the perfect combo of being a toy and a collectible.  It's been released time and time again.  So, everyone has a shot at it.  Not much else to say other than to check out all the great content that features it.

1983 Hiss Tank Profile

Hiss Tank Diorama

1983 Hiss Tank by steelbrigade

1983 Hiss Tank by thedustinmccoy

1983 Hiss Tank by gijoe_guy

1983 Hiss Tank by theoldnerd

1983 Hiss Tank by tituslester32

1983 Hiss Tank by Darkstar Vintage

1983 Hiss Tank by gijoe_guy

1983 Hiss Tank by sintechness

1983 Hiss Tank by fosilru

1983 Hiss Tank by viper_space

1983 FANG - Around The Web

Little flying machines make for better toys.  They are fun to play with and and easier to manipulate.  The FANG would have been a more integral part of my childhood.  But, my younger brother got it too early in  his life.  And, it was quickly broken, rendering it a small part of our childhood collection.  Now, I appreciate the design of the copter much more.  Sure, it's a death trap for the pilot.  But, it's cheap to build and packs a lot of firepower for short range attacks.  I just need to get around to completing mine.

1983 FANG Profile

1983 FANG by Scarrviper

1983 FANG by bruxovigo

1983 FANG by gijoe_guy

1983 FANG by Nekoman

1983 FANG by ironman3719

1983 FANG by dashiellrfairborne

1983 FANG by formbx257

1983 FANG by masterbungle

1983 FANG by HCC788

1983 FANG by slipstream80

1983 Silver Pads Grand Slam

Grand Slam was among the first repaints in the vintage Joe line.  In 1983, he, Grunt and the Cobra Trooper all got the repaint treatment.  Grunt and the newly named Viper Pilot were given prominent places as the pilots for the well hyped Joe gliders.  Those toys were garbage, though.  And, the figures remain the only good thing about them.  Grand Slam, though, had less fanfare.  Instead of getting an all new toy to call his own, Grand Slam was packaged with the JUMP.  It's likely that the excellent jet pack hadn't been perceived as a great value by the parents of 1982.  So, Hasbro decided to start including a figure to entice more people to buy it. In the 1983 catalog, the silver Grand Slam appears with no special indication that he's a new addition to an old toy.  40 years later, JUMPs remain common and attainable.  But, the Silver Pads Grand Slam has become a collector prized figure and taken on a bit of rarified air.

I would have sworn to you for many years that this figure was a 1984 release.  I had him listed as 1984 on my original profile for a long time.  This is simply due to the fact that my discovery of this Grand Slam occurred in 1984.  The local Service Merchandise store had a small section in the back where they kept smaller toys that didn't make sense to store in the display cases.  This section was mostly figures.  But, there were some small vehicles, too.  Among them was the JUMP with this newly colored Grand Slam.  This Service Merchandise was the only place I recall seeing this new Grand Slam coloring.  And, as no one else had the the silver figure, I desperately wanted the JUMP.  Each time we went to the store, I'd go back to that aisle and wait for my parents.  Inevitably, they'd find me with the JUMP box in my hands, hoping I'd get one for my birthday in 1984.  

On the big day, my parents came through.  Along with the Whale, I got a Silver Pads Grand Slam and JUMP.  Also, for that birthday, I got a new Stormshadow (my brother's from just two months earlier had already lost or broken most of the accessories) and a straight arm Scarlett figure.  I spent the afternoon and evening playing with the new Joes with all my friends, eating pizza and then watching Beverly Hills Cop.  Which, somehow my dad managed to rent without my mother's objections.  It all wrapped into a perfect day and forever associated this Grand Slam with great memories and feelings.

That alone was enough to keep Grand Slam around.  The only red pads figure we owned was an old straight arm from a HAL my brother got for his birthday in October of 1982.  So, the character seemed new.  And, armed with the jet pack, Grand Slam was a powerful force.  Through 1985, Grand Slam remained one of my favored figures and he even held his own as the class of 1985 slowly joined my collection.  At some point in 1986, a swivel arm Flash entered into our collection.  I'm not sure where he came from.  But, it was a nice figure.  For Christmas that year, my brother got the Dreadnok Air Assault set from Sears.  Not being a Dreadnok fan, though, I kept the Skyhawk as a Joe vehicle.  It became a new branch of the Joe team.  Prior to this, air power hadn't been a big part of my play pattern.  Really, a well timed airstrike or Dragonfly arrival would completely upend the adventure as air superiority was too much for Cobra to overcome.  But, the real reason was that airplanes were hard to play with.  Smaller aircraft were OK.  But, the larger toys looked great while being too large and bulky to really use in a detailed play scenario.  

I needed a pilot for this new Skyhawk.  But, I had few choices available.  I tried some figures who had sculpted helmets.  But, they could rarely fit into the vehicle.  I then had an idea.  Grand Slam, with his more unique silver colors would become the pilots of the Skyhawks (yes, the figure became an army builder) while Flash would become the more common land soldier who supplemented the new force.  In short, this worked fantastically.  The Flash figure's would invade on land while Grand Slam would fly in the air.  I would give Grand Slam either Ripcord or Lifeline's air mask, to make him more pilot-like.  Grand Slam might save the day.  He might die in battle.  In many cases, divers had to rescue Grand Slam from deep under the water where he was trapped in the cockpit of his aircraft.  Sometimes he lived and sometimes he didn't.  But, through the end of 1987, these two figures were among the most used toys in my bedroom.  

When I put my Joes away for good in 1988, Grand Slam and Flash were carefully wrapped in plastic bags and tucked away inside a red Lego container that I hid in the back of my closet.  My youngest brother, of course, would find it and remove figures when I wasn't around.  But, he was after newer toys and left the Grand Slam and Flash intact.  As an adult collector, I found that Grand Slam.  He was relatively worn and, at some point, I had replaced his crotch with that from a 1982 red Grand Slam figure.  But, he was still there.  With my memories intact, I made a high quality Silver Pads Grand Slam a key acquisition as a collector.  And, I was fortunate in that as the figure has become far too expensive for a vanity purchase these days.

Silver Pads Grand Slam figures were only available with the JUMP.  In one of the weird anomalies of the early Joe line, though, there was a three pack of Hawk, Clutch and Red Pads Grand Slam figures that were available in bags.  The Grand Slams, though, all include the Silver Pads Grand Slam filecard.  But, the figures are all red pads variants.  In an other really fun oddity, Hasbro actually factory overpainted some red pads figures with the silver paint.  As such, you'll see some Silver Grand Slams that have red paint peeking out from behind the silver.  Many people quickly out these as fakes.  But, some are legitimate products of the Hasbro factories that were trying to save money on overstock figures.

While Flash was released around the world, Grand Slam only appeared in the US.  It's likely that his parts were shipped off to make Grunts and Flashes all around the globe.  But, poor Grand Slam never saw release outside of Hasbro.  Even the comic, which made a point to showcase all of the early Joe team, ignored Grand Slam.  He got one great moment kicking Major Bludd through a bus window in issue #17.  But, that was about it other than making fun of Short-Fuse's name in #22.  Grand Slam didn't return as a character until Hasbro dusted him off in the late 2000's as part of the DTC line.  While Grand Slam figures tend to command a premium due to his reduced release area, the character is pretty much forgotten and has little influence in the Joe world.

So, this figure is pricey.  Nice, mint and complete figures will run at least $100.  Some of them with JUMP packs will even get to $150.  Dealers get the higher amount all the time.  For a figure that's "rare", though, there's actually quite a few Silver Pads Grand Slams out there.  So, it's not hard to get one.  But, you'll pay for it since perception outweighs reality for many old Joe releases these days.  As the silver paint wears easily, though, finding mint specimens is getting harder and harder.  And, my desire to showcase the figure in outdoor photos also diminishes as replacement figures become more and more expensive.  The upside to Grand Slam is that he has a figure that's found a collector afterlife.  But, the fact that it's due to rarity and price instead of quality is kind of a bummer.  Each collector will find different value in owning Grand Slam.  For me, the childhood connection makes this silver version a must own.  But, at the same time, did I not have the memories of the figure, the red pads version would be just fine for me.