2023 Soundwave with Zartan and Zarana

It has been one year since Hasbro announced the 2022 Stinger.  It was a surprise vehicle with limited quantities offered on Pulse.  It shipped fairly quickly after the announcement.  To this day, though, we do not know where the rest of the Stinger production run ended up.  A lot were shipped to Europe.  But, I do think there's still stock out there since Hasbro has been open about how badly their warehouses are stuffed full of unsold merchandise.

But, finally, after a full 12 months of speculation on the death of o-rings, Hasbro finally offered up a new product.  It was the long rumoured Soundwave who transforms into the Thunder Machine.  It's pretty likely that Hasbro designed the Soundwave back when they thought the o-ring line might have a modicum of success.  But, after the retail disaster that was both Megatron and Bumblebee, it's unlikely any retailers were willing to subsidize another shelf clogging disaster that also came with a stupidly high price.

But, it now seems that retailers are now once again willing to work with Hasbro to get this long suffering product to retail.  And, you can now order this Soundwave along with an o-ring Zarana and Zartan for a whopping $100.  After tax and shipping, you're going to spending a lot of money on two carded o-ring figures.  But, I think it's a lot better to get two of them than just one like we did with the 2022 toys.  I just want high quality figures that command that premium price

As to the toy itself, the Thunder Machine doesn't make much sense.  Historically, Dreadnok themed toys don't do very well among collectors.  Aside from that, though, the Thunder Machine isn't really even a top 10 iconic Joe vehicle.  They're pretty easy to find and not terribly expensive.  So, seeing a remake is weird and out of left field.  But, we haven't seen one in nearly 4 decades.  So, from that perspective, it's OK.  I'm just disappointed that they didn't make it in different colors.  A Thunder Machine in Sears Stinger colors would have been awesome.  But, I don't need another one in the same colors as the original.

It's the figures, though, that are so disappointing.  One, we've seen both Zartan and Zarana multiple times since the vintage days.  I'd really rather have molds that weren't repainted in the 2000's.  (And, in the case of both these figures, hit MASSIVE clearance during that time.)  But, they are characters that people tend to like.  And, they are both good names that might help move the toys.  But, the renders from the release are not great.  

To begin with, the figures have painted heads.  Those are terrible.  They suck and ruin any figure.  We need flesh plastic heads, not pink painted versions that will wear and chip with the slightest use.  After that, though, there are other positives and negatives.  

Zarana finally features the arm tattoo that was removed from the figure in 1986.  I can't tell if they added the flesh colored paint under her ripped pants as the 1986 figure also intended.  It's a nice vintage homage.  But, the rest of Zarana is pretty much the same as the original.  Her black gloves, though, go all the way up to her elbow joints.  With the juxtaposition of black gloves versus flesh upper arms, it's painfully obvious that this is cost savings move on a $100 toy.  I'd accept black elbows on $4 Funskool figures: not on $20+ figures geared for collectors.  Zarana's head also isn't great.  It's like they tried too hard on it.  We'll see if the final product is better.  But, we have yet to see renders undergo massive improvements prior to release.

Zartan features a face with paint that based on his cartoon appearance.  But, sadly, it looks too much like Kiss makeup.  The upside is that the figure will include with backpack and face mask along with an update on his original pistol.  So, that's an improvement.  But, the colors on his chest plate are a combo of his 1984 (that really worked) and his 2005 (that didn't work) colors.  Again, for a $5 figure, this is fine.  For a massively expensive collectible, this really isn't.  The figure should be a perfect rendition of Zartan.  Not something that's indistinguishable from a $3 comic pack figure.

So, as you can tell, I'm not a fan of this item.  I can't abide by Transformers being seen as integral to Joe.  I don't want a $60 Transformer that is unsellable on the secondary market.  So, in end, I'm paying $50+ for two figures that are deeply flawed.  After the disappointing quality on the Skystriker figures, I'm really fed up with paying premium prices for quality that was poor when the figures cost a fraction of their current price.  

Sadly, it seems there are at least two more of these in some stage of development.  A MOBAT/Optimus Prime with Hawk and a TTT with Sgt. Slaughter are the names.  We'll see if they come to be.  I don't see this item being a huge seller, especially with it being available at every obscure online store in the world.  But, the historic failure of the first two Transformers didn't preclude another being made.  I'm at a point where I'd rather have no o-ring Joes than poor quality figures that are included with a toy line in which I have interest and have to pay a premium to acquire.

2005 Comic Pack Zarana

The Comic Packs were an inspired idea.  The offered promise of spectacular new figures, long desired repaints and new characters who had been missing from the Joe line for its 22 year run.  But, in the three years the concept was produced, very little of these promises came to be.  Instead, the Comic Packs became a home of overused parts, repetitive characters and releases that were barely different from the original figure releases.  Such was the case with the 2005 Zarana figure.  Ostensibly, a new Zarana should have been a welcomed release.  But the actual figure offered nothing that could not be acquired from either the original figure or the super common and $4 Funskool Zarana that was available at the time, too.

The calling card of the Comic Packs became newly sculpted heads.  That (along with the $10 price point for 3 figures!) was the primary drawing point for the product.  The problem, though, was that the heads didn't really offer anything extraordinary.  In fact, pretty much every new head in the 2004 releases was inferior to the original and many of the 2005 new heads were either too small or too large.  Hasbro started to find their stride in later 2005, though, as figures like Firefly, Serpentor and Fred all featured some excellent sculpting.  But, there were also duds like Tunnel Rat, Zartan and Roadblock who were released at the same time.  Zarana's head falls into the middle.  It's not bad.  It's not great.  It's a softer look than the mohawked 1986 heads.  But, I'm not sure that really fits with Zarana's character.

In the comic, Zarana slowly overtook the character role that had been held by the Baroness.  She was given leadership positions.  While you can question why she was chosen for this instead of just leaving the Baroness there, at least she was consistently portrayed as rather ruthless in the comics.  She wasn't a character who was offered a redemption arc.  (Like the Baroness was.)  So, for that reason, at least her character was consistent.  My biggest complaint with this 2005 figure is that the newly sculpted head doesn't really convey that.  Zarana was an angry character.  This figure shows her as more calm and put together.  As Zarana was never depicted that way, the new face makes no sense.  It doesn't flow with Zarana's characterization and is somewhat anti-thetical to her entire existence.

My other issue, though, is that this figure is pretty much the 1986 color scheme with very slight shading differences.  If you have the 1986 or Funskool release, this 2005 figure offers you nothing new.  While the 2004 convention figure tried and failed to really change the look for Zarana, they didn't take any chances.  The Comic Packs were a place to do that.  But, to be fair, Zarana never appeared in any color scheme other than one matching her figure.  So, there wasn't a ton of artistic license to be taken from the source material.  But, you get a blue and pink Zarana figure that looks like a famous actress is playing Zarana in a movie instead of someone who looks like the character.

The original card artwork for the 1986 Zarana showcased two features that were changed on the figure prior to its release.  The first was that Zarana had a tattoo on her arm.  This was removed.  The second was that Zarana was not wearing pink leggings under her ripped jeans.  So, she exposed a large amount of fleshy thigh.  This was too much for a figure also wearing a low cut crop top.  So, the pink undergarment was added via a paint application.  This 2005 does not bring back the tattoo.  We can then argue about whether they changed her leg to be bare skin or still covered by an undergarment.  When I asked this question of collectors, the results were mixed...meaning that any definitive change Hasbro may or may not have wanted to make is still completely muddled.  Due to Hasbro's inability to adequately paint caucasian skin tones in the 2000's, Zarana's leg could be skin or pink tights.  I'll leave it to the individual collector to make their decision.  

Overall, the quality of this figure is mixed.  While the limbs move easily and don't fall apart, there is an issue with the head.  It will only turn to the right.  I have three Zaranas and none of their heads will move left.  You could probably force it.  But, when you do, you'll crack the torso around Zarana's neck.  This is a common affliction of the Comic Pack figures.  So, you have to exercise a bit of caution when positioning the head.  The gear fits and the thumbs are soft.  So, you won't break them.  Zarana's face sculpt is actually really well done.  But, it doesn't look like Zarana.  Honestly, the face would have worked better on the 2006 Lady Jaye figure.  It's just too kind looking to fit with the mean and dastardly Zarana and it doesn't display the effects of the Dreadnok hard lived life in which Zarana partook.  The paint applications are strong, though.  So, the figure showcases much of the sculpted details, just like the original figure does.

Zarana's accessories are on the low end of Dreadnok gear.  She includes a backpack that's not all that interesting, it's just in black this time.  And, her weapon du jour is a saw.  This isn't a realistic chainsaw like Buzzer's from 1985.  It's a spin blade thing that really would only have purpose in sawing people.  If you look at it like that, the saw is rather gruesome.  But, honestly, it's kind of boring.  As a kid, figures without firearms were tough to use.  And, as Buzzer had a far better saw, there was really no reason to use Zarana.  Her saw appeared a couple of times in the early 2000's and you can find it in black and silver with various other figures.  So, you can change around the look of this Zarana's weapons a bit.

A final word about figure quality.  The plastic used on the Comic Pack Joes (and, Joe figures in general) during the early 2000's is turning out to be absolute garbage.  Especially for whites, light blues, greys and flesh colors.  You know, basic colors that appear on a ton of figures.  You'll notice in the top photos below that the Zarana's upper arms are starting to discolor.  The third photo is from 2007 and you can see the different coloring on the figure's arms.  Like the 2005 Scrap Iron, this is an inevitability and not something you can really stop.  Carded figures are seeing the same thing happen still in the package.  The plastic isn't holding up at all.  I only hope the super expensive 2022 Pulse release use better quality materials.  But, in the not too distant future, there will be no mint 2005 Zaranas left.  This sucks.  There's no other way to put it.  But, it's a grim reality for the 2000's era Joe figures.

Zarana has an interesting history.  The original figure was sculpted with a fatter head with earrings.  Hasbro didn't like this and decided to sculpt a new head that was also released in 1986.  This figure color changed like Zartan and Zandar.  But, once her retail run was over, Zarana disappeared.  Then, in the mid 1990's, Zarana showed up in India.  Funskool released her for several years.  However, prior to the mass imports of Funskool that started in early 2001, Funskool had taken Zarana out of production.  So, she was a relatively difficult figure to find at the time.  But, in 2002, Funskool revived several classic molds: including Zarana.  There are subtle Funskool Zarana variants.  But, she is one of the few Funskool figures who doesn't have major variants in coloring.  In 2003, Hasbro recalled 18 molds from Funskool.  Zarana was among them.  The club quickly put her mold to use in the poorly received 2004 Dreadnok themed Convention set.  For years after it's release, these figures were available for below original price.  Then, this Comic Pack Zarana debuted in 2005.  The mold was retired at that point.  Despite all the versions of Zarana, she really only has her one classic look.

As the Joe market finally starts to cool down, figures like this Zarana are feeling the pinch.  While dealers offer a ton of them for $30 or so each, they don't sell.  Mint and complete figures are worth about $12-$15 each.  It's a fall from a year ago when they were nearly double that.  And, while some carded Comic Packs from that era still command premiums, carded Zaranas top out around $50 and she is, far and away, the least desirable figure in the pack.  So, if you're missing her, Zartan and the Fred Cobra Commander, just buy and open a carded set.  For me, this figure isn't a good Zarana.  The original heads are better.  This figure is a good attempt at something different.  But, it just didn't deliver.

1986 Zarana - Around The Web

I was never a huge Zarana fan.  While I found a use for Zandar for a short while, Zarana never had that occur with her.  Her lack of firing weapon and general poor design left her as relatively useless for me.  My brother had the earrings head version which I thought looked like one of my aunts.  That's about the end of the pertinence Zarana had for me.  I didn't care for her being such a prominent character in the comics and would skip over the pages that featured her and Road Pig.  But, Zarana has found a large collecting audience since the 2000's and remains a popular figure.  As such, there's tons of great work that's been done with her.  Here's some of my favorite Zarana content from around the web.

1986 Zarana Profile

Zarana by matemylar

Zarana by gvilla74

Zarana by badgerscratch

Zarana by gen_liederkranz

Zarana by plasticbattles

Zarana by evilface

Zarana by gijoeunion

Zarana by markito2212

Zarana by sirwigzwellington

Zarana by gi_joeisthere

Diorama - Island Raid

In my old backyard, there was a section on the left hand side that was the "forest" of about 20 younger trees.  The ground beneath them was small river rock over a plastic tarp to keep the weeds down.  But, when it rained, I got large puddles in the area that make for a great photo setting.  You can see the location used often in profiles from 2001 to 2003 on the site.

It was still raining when I went out take these pics.  The water was at it's highest and there just a single dry patch.  My intent was to showcase my newly acquired 2002 Shipwreck figure that you can see below.  But, it ended up being a good way to get some Dreadnok shots.  Again, you see the theme of a large force being necessary to take out the Dreadnoks. I don't know why I return to that theme a few times as the Dreadnoks as characters were not a huge part of my childhood Joe collection.  But, they made for some different show of force type shots.

Diorama - Busted

This dio was taken in Indiana in either December or January.  It was a clear, dry and sunny day: as you can see in the pics.  But, it was freezing cold.  By the time the whole thing was set up, the vintage thumbs started getting brittle and my camera kept shutting off as the battery was too cold.  I liked the idea of a large group of law enforcement capturing the Dreadnoks and the show of force it would take to do so.


You'll see the CORPS! Hummer in the pics. At the time, it was about the best Hummer you get for Joes.  But, it was cheap and brittle.  But, it also cost like $10 with three figures.  So, you get what you pay for.  Just off camera was my relatively new Funskool Super Cop capturing my relatively new Funskool Red Dog.  They were the main reason I got all this out.  But, the rest of the scene was pretty fun to work out.

1986 Zarana

The Zartan gimmick was a huge success for the Joe design team. However, rather than restraining themselves, they proved the axiom that too much of a good thing is bad. As such, they created Zandar and Zarana, Zartan's brother and sister. While this may have seemed like a good idea at the time, it really started to take Joe in a direction towards everything being just a little too interconnected. While some of the intricacies of the comic storyline really fed of this, they did, on occasion, take it to excess. The primary result of this is two obscure figures that don't see much fanfare among modern collectors.

I'm not a big Zarana fan. The primary reason I wanted to profile this figure, though, is that she is the only figure in the entire line who had a major mold change occur while the figure was in production. The corrected Zarana, which can be seen on the left in the photo below, has a sleek, thin face that makes her look closer to her card art and the manner in which she was portrayed in the comic. The original Zarana, which is on the right in the photo, has a head that makes her look...um...well...kind of...like she would be a season ticket holder to the WNBA. I don't know why the mold was changed, though many people have speculated on that very subject. It makes her, though, a collectible figure. While mail ins like the Steel Brigade and Starduster had different molded parts on their various incarnations, all of those parts had already been used on other figures. Both of Zarana's heads are original. It was a running change that created two distinct versions of a figure.

I've made my feelings about female figures known throughout this website. Needless to say, I have little need for Zarana. Currently, she sits in a bag, with her accessories, at the very back of my '86 Cobra drawer. I removed her for the photo shoot that produced the picture below, but that is about the end of any further use she might receive. I just don't have anything that would call for a figure like her to be used. Her look is so dated that she is really only good as a historical piece to remind us of the horrible clothes that were considered "fashionable" in the mid '80's. On that level, the figure is kind of cool. Of course, she does have a fan following. She had a great run in the comic and was a highly developed character. While Zandar just kind of stood around, Zarana became someone who almost replaced the Baroness as the pre-eminent Cobra female after the Baroness defected back to Destro. At least that leaves her some sort of other legacy on Joe history.

Zaranas aren't too tough to find. She was an unpopular female figure that modern fan-boys seem to desire. That does not, though, make her very expensive. Usually, you can get a mint, complete, non-butch Zarana for around $10-$12. Expect to pay about a 25% to 50% premium for the original version. Personally, I haven't found either Zarana to be much harder to find than the other. The original and new seem to occur with similar frequency. As there are so few Joes that are rare, some dealers will try to sell you on the fact that the original Zarana was produced in much smaller numbers and is worth a high dollar purchase. Don't be fooled by this nonsense. These are the same people who will tell you that it's impossible to acquire a mint, loose, complete Baroness for under $50. These figures are out there and aren't highly desired. Zarana is a figure of whom you only need one of each version. Most of the modern collectors who were snatching up Baroness figures last year now have them. We've seen prices on Baronesses fall to under $15 from their highs in the mid $20 range. Adult collectors have their fill of these guys and unique, non army building female figures are starting to come down in price. As such, if you find a good deal on either Zarana, now is the time to take advantage. There is a new fan base for Joes that is growing. It would be good practice to take advantage on the lulls in pricing when they occur.

While I don't need any new Zaranas, I would like a Vypra. If you can help, email me.