2005 Cobra Imperial Guard - By Past Nastification

Return of the Jedi gave us our first really good look at The Emperor (I’m talking about the time before the prequels).  Sure, he was cool.  But cooler still were his helmeted and cloaked personal bodyguards.  The Emperor’s Royal Guard were badass yet stoic*.

Someone at Hasbro saw value in the concept and imported it to GI Joe.  

Replace the Emperor with Cobra Commander, and replace the Royal Guards with Imperial Guards and you’re good to go.  The Imperial Guards (four of them!) were included in 2005’s Cobra Imperial Procession set, which also included a Cobra Commander figure and a Baroness figure.  Like the Royal Guards, the Imperial Guards are encased in their uniforms from head to toe, with no visible hints of humanity.  The Royal Guards’ uniforms are crimson and burgundy, and the Imperial Guards’ are not too far off, featuring mostly dark metallic fuchsia with dark bronze elements.

The Imperial Guard is a far better concept than it is a figure.  

The figure, in ARAH format, is made up of a Range-Viper head/waist/legs, and the chest/back/arms of Cobra Commander V3 (Battle Armor version).  Dropping CC’s personal bodyguards in a recolored bastardized version of his own armor is somehow fitting, but the Range-Viper head is far too iconic to work as anything but a Range-Viper.  A Cobra Officer head, with a retooled neck, might have been a more interesting choice.  

As far as accessories, Hasbro disappoints.  Each Imperial Guards got a flag.  Yes, a flag.  Because you can use a flag to defend your leader from assassination attempts.  The flags feature nicely done flagpoles.  So there’s that.

Although it would have been overpriced, I’m sure the GI Joe Collectors’ Club might have been able to do something interesting with this concept.  Hasbro tried, but not enough.  

*It’s important to point out the Royal Guard (or whatever the hell they were called) later shown defending Snoke in Star Wars The Last Jedi were horrible.  Disney tried to hybridize the Royal Guard with Power Rangers and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, creating some truly rancid designs.   

2005 Comic Pack Short Fuse - By Past Nastification

 A swing and a miss!  That’s the best way to sum up the 2005 Short-Fuze, a comic pack figure.  It’s one of Hasbro’s re-animated uses of the ARAH molds to create figures directly inspired by their comic book appearances.   

Some of the figures done in the sub-series (for lack of a better word), were pretty decent.  Stalker really captured the look/feel of the early Herb Trimpe artwork.  Short-Fuze is a good effort, but a low reward.  

Short-Fuze’s head was new.  After not having his spectacles for 22 years, Hasbro finally decided to set this right.  The headsculpt has a center-part haircut, a somewhat pensive facial expression, and the glasses.  Two problems plague the head, though.  First, it’s underscaled.  If it were 15% larger, it would be perfectly scaled to the ARAH body.  Secondly, Short-Fuze’s glasses are painted as sunglasses, not regular glasses.

The glasses could have been sculpted “clear” like those of the Baroness, with no actual lenses, way back in 1984.  Or at least colored in a “clear substitute” color, like sky blue or dove grey. 

Problems aside, this is still the best original/un-shared Short-Fuze head.  It might be the only original head Short-Fuze has had.  The original ARAH head was the Hawk/Steeler/Flash/Short-Fuze head.  In the mid 2000’s, both Downtown and Blizzard heads were used.  Poor Short-Fuze didn’t even show up in the New Sculpt era.  In the 25A line, Doc’s head was used.  At least he’s not Grand Slam, the only OG13 figure to never have an original head.   

The body is a retread of sorts of the ’82 body (with the larger belt) paired with ’83 swivel-arm battle grip arms.  The uniform color is green, but it is a forest ranger green, not olive drab.  Admittedly, it’s close to the green used by Marvel for the OG13 uniforms, but it manages to somehow look very… plastic, if not waxy.  The chest harness, belt, and boots are painted in a wonderful dusty tan color, and it somehow offsets the badness of the forest ranger green.  Hasbro earns big points for painting the turtleneck red.  Good work, H!   

By the way, yojoe.com says that the body (except for the head and lower arms) are resculpts based on the ’82 figure.  Hasbro did a good job on this.  I didn’t notice and probably never would have.  Yojoe.com also put a sidearm in the package (shared with Flash and Rock ‘n Roll) as belonging to Short-Fuze.  I must not have agreed at the time, although looking at the package it clearly was intended as for Short-Fuze, because it didn’t make it to the storage tray. 

The obvious accessories I was smart enough to properly retain were the backpack and the mortar.  These pieces are frustrating.  In 1997, the correct ones were released in the Stars and Stripes Forever set.  Seven or eight years must be a long time in toy world, because this Short-Fuze came with a Roadblock backpack and a mortar.  I had always assumed it was a Downtown mortar, but it’s not.  It’s also not a Sub-Zero mortar.  Was it a new one made just for this Short-Fuze?  I don’t know.  I would have preferred the ’82 gear again, but these are acceptable. 

 Speaking of accessories, Short-Fuze didn’t have a helmet/visor.  This figure was obviously designed to showcase its headsculpt, but that shouldn’t have precluded a helmet/visor.  

After 1983, Short-Fuze didn’t see much comic book usage.  One of his few additional appearances was in issue #25, when he was part of the transport team that took Storm Shadow to Alcatraz.  That uniform featured a collared button-up shirt with pockets.  Given that Hasbro made some obscure comic pack versions (karate gi Scarlett or astronaut Flash or undercover Grunt), this might have been an interesting choice.    

Instead of nailing Short-Fuze’s comic book look, Hasbro took small missteps.  Sadly, they’re ones that add up and detract from the figure’s overall quality.  

 

2004 McDonald's Snake Eyes

Before Hasbro gave us official 5 POA GI Joe action figures by way of the GI Joe:  Retaliation drivers, we got a glimpse of things-to-come thanks to McDonald’s. 

In 2004 McDonald’s produced GI Joe Happy Meals.  Some came with hyper deformed vehicles and some came with figures.  For the figures, McDonald’s safely stuck to major players, using Cobra Commander, Duke, Dr. Mindbender, and Snake-Eyes.  These characters were all released in 1:18 scale (or just slightly smaller).

You might consider this a Happy Meal pack-in toy, and not a true action figure.  I respect that.  Viewing this is an action figure might be generous.  Either way, I’m approaching this review as if it’s simply a low POA figure.
    
When I reviewed Dr. Mindbender over two years ago, I liked the figure.  Despite its low POA count, it brought something new to the table for Dr. Mindbender, in terms of pushing the uniform even further towards “mad scientist” than even the New Sculpt figure had.
  
Plus I’m very forgiving of the low POA format.  I enjoy the Retaliation Clutch figure, too.  
But today, dear reader, you can put away your hate daggers.  I have to give McSnake-Eyes a thumbs down.  It doesn’t accomplish anything with its design.   

If this Snake-Eyes were substantially new or a progression in some way, I’d say good things about it.  The bandaged head/sunglasses design would have been defendable, though not appropriate for a Happy Meal.  The Invisible Man-esque Snake-Eyes is now the last comic book design we haven’t seen translated to plastic in one format or another aside from customs.    
  
In all fairness, Happy Meal Snake-Eyes is well sculpted, sidestepping the issue of almost no articulation.  The proportions are musculature are more realistic than the contemporary “real” Joe figures of the New Sculpt era.  The pose is very fluid, with our favorite mute ninja commando in a wide-set foot stance with dramatically posed arms.  The headsculpt is very unique, with an interesting design and clean lines, but it looks more like something Alan Davis would have drawn for a character in Excalibur (timely!) than Hasbro or Marvel would have made for a Snake-Eyes design.
The head doesn’t move, but the way.  It is technically a point-of-articulation, but it will not move at all.  It’s locked in place.  Its craning-forward head/neck, which does work with the intended body, isn't even usable for customs unless you’re trying to make a scoliosis Snake-Eyes.    

The detailing throughout the uniform is good, but most of it is recycled from NS designs.  The gi top, webgear, and tall boots are all things seen before.  One detail we hadn’t seen is the backwards S on the belt buckle, creating the appearance that Snake-Eyes battles Cobra AND literacy. How did this nugget of stupidity get through quality control?  Maybe it’s supposed to be a snake and not an S?  I don’t know.  

None of the sculpted gear on Snake-Eyes is definitively weaponry.  No knives or grenades or firearms.  I understand that this is a McDonald’s toy, but at some point McDonald’s should have realized that the character IS a soldier, after all.  One leg has what is probably a sheath on it, but that’s as close as it gets.    

The figure came with a compass backpack.  Sorry, I don’t have one to show, but it didn’t help the overall appearance anyway.  As a Happy Meal pack-in, Snake-Eyes included no weapons or other gear.  

There’s also the issue of the color.  Taking a cue from the ’82/’83 figures, Snake-Eyes is molded in a solid color.  Black might have been too dismal a color for a Happy Meal, so McDonald’s went with a medium grey.  Not charcoal.  This is a grey that registers for Firefly, but not for Snake-Eyes so much.  These pack-ins were loaded with paint applications, but Snake-Eyes could’ve used a few touches of black here and there.   

I can’t say that I despise this figure.  It gets a thumb down from me, but not one backed with animosity or nerd rage.  More of a meh.

2009 Agent Helix - by Past Nastification

With the 2009 release of The Rise of Cobra, Hasbro pumped out many, many figures.

I’m just assuming that most of you didn’t like the movie.  If you did, that’s okay.  It just makes it easier for you to embrace its toy line, I’d assume.  The ROC toy line stayed with the 25th Anniversary/Modern Era format, but felt like a unique subset within the GI Joe brand.  But for me, at least, I try to look at the ROC figures as their own things and just ignore the movie that spawned them.     

Many of figures were inherently good, like most of the Baroness figures, which visually lined up other existing versions of the character. 

Some were them were good if you could imagine they existed outside of the movie’s continuity, like The Doctor as being a not-Cobra Commander character.

Then there were figures dropped into the ROC toy line whose characters weren’t even in the movie, but didn’t exist anywhere previously. Agent Helix is one of these figures/characters.

Agent Helix has a look that reads “techno saboteur” more than soldier.  Given that the title “Agent” is part of the character’s name, this is obviously what Hasbro was aiming for. 

The sculptor(s) did some top notch work on the figure.  The head features an attractive if slightly long face with a neutral expression.  The hair is a separate piece in what’s probably best described as a “Rachel from Friends” layered haircut.  It’s further accentuated by a two-tone color scheme, obviously mimicking the unnatural color-streaking fad of a decade ago.  The face and the hair are nicely done and infuse the figure with a lot of its charm.   

The uniform is not quite a bodysuit, but very tight shirt/pants over a lanky frame. It features a harness/body armor system that manages to provide protection to the abdomen, but leaves the upper torso completely exposed, which looks interesting at first but becomes ridiculous when you realize it’s very bondage-like.

“But the Baroness-”  Stop.  Don’t say it, because I am aware of the Baroness’ outfit.  But its armor plating appears to cover the entire torso, and even pops up on other parts of the body.  Agent Helix just wears a bulletproof girdle.   And besides, I’m always okay with Cobra designs being a bit sillier than Joe ones. 

Bondage harness aside, this is a good design.  The mustard yellow on the upper portion of the shirt gives a color pop against the otherwise dark and cold colors of uniform.  The silver of the pouches (or whatever they are) adds another slice of visual interest.  It looks clean in an antiseptic way that doesn’t contrast with the other colors, and even works with them.

There are plenty of great details on the figure.  The overall sculpting is top notch, as it was on most of the ROC figures.  There’s a techno-kibble device on the figure’s right upper arm.  The floating utility belt allows for the pouches to dangle over the hips.  The compression-style kneepads are perfect.  The sleeves are three-quarters length, like some sports jerseys.  The long boots have side pouches.  These are all little details that show that someone put effort into making this figure.   

Agent Helix’s gear is plentiful, though largely unnecessary.   The futuristic rifle and two sidearms would have been enough, but the figure also has the obligatory oversized missile launcher (that looks like at best like a Nerf toy and not a representation of anything close to real world), and even a machete.  Everything is nicely colored, which is better than neon green or safety orange, so there’s that.  And any accessories you don’t want to display with the figure can go into a baggie, tray, or parts bin.   Or even a trashcan if you’re like that. 

Had this character been introduced into the GI Joe mythos by ARAH format when I was a kid, I’m sure it would have been a welcomed addition. 

Time for a side rant.

Even 37 years since 1:18 scale GI Joe began, there are only about 30 different female characters that have one or multiple figures, and that’s including exclusive GI Joe Collectors’ Club figures.  This number is based on characters, not total figures.  So although there may are many multiple versions of Scarlett, the Baroness, and Lady Jaye in different formats, that still only adds up to 3 characters.  My point is that we’ve gotten less than one new female character per year on average.  Collectors even appreciate head-to-toe repaints representing new characters, like ARAH Jinx as Vypra or later as the swordsmith Araskikage sisters (also stupidly named Vypra), or ARAH Baroness as Chameleon.

Thanks, I feel better.   

A totally new figure/character, especially one done so well, is greatly valued.  Agent Helix might be the most important character to come out of the ROC toy line.  Just don’t think about the bulletproof girdle. 

Suited Figures: Toht & Cobra Commander (Toht body) - by Past Nastification

An ongoing complaint I’ve had with 1:18 figures is how they never quite land when it comes to dress attire.  The ARAH format was particularly bad due to its many points of articulation, which completely destroy the “flow lines” of a suit.

I’m starting a new subset of occasional reviews I’ll call “Dress Attire!” 

A good starting place for 1:18 scale suit-wearing figures isn’t even within the world of GI Joe.  It’s Toht, from Kenner’s 1982 Raiders of the Lost Ark line.  Wearing a double-breasted suit and a Homburg-style hat, Toht is about as 1930’s/1940’s as one could get.  This is important because the dress attire from that period, almost a century ago, still lines up with men’s suits today.

Granted, the dress attire/suits of yesterday and today aren’t exactly the same.  The double-breasted suit took its last modern breath in the early 90’s, but a handful are still out there.  As for the hat, no one under 90 wears hats with suits anymore.  In fact, only hipsters wear hats -the formal kind that haberdashers would sell- these days, and that’s usually paired with skinny t-shirts and scarves (as pointed out numerous times by Adam Carolla).

But a Toht figure wouldn’t look out of place next to a GI Joe figure, despite the differences in articulation and build.   Kenner succeeded with Toht because there is no waist/hip articulation.  Some of you probably see that as an automatic failure, and if high articulation is your thing, I respect that.  But to my eye, the unbroken line of the suit down to its bottom edge works perfectly.  Some of the suit bottom is sculpted onto the tops of the legs, which works fine for the t-crotch design.  The closest ARAH style suit figure, Headman, really reveals the failure of the format to capture the look of a suit. 

This is a good figure, but for this review I’m seeing it as a figure in a suit, not through the lens of all-things-Indy.  I’m sure Indiana Jones collectors have reviews reflecting that viewpoint.  Just so you know why I’m not talking about how film accurate it is or isn’t.  I also regret that I can’t show you Toht’s amazing draped-around-the-shoulders trenchoat because I lost it.  In 1984 I placed it on a Major Bludd figure, where it looked even more amazing.  When I organized my Joe collection in 1998, I must have separated it from Bludd without putting it back with the few Indy figures I had.   Bummer.     

This is a seven POA figure.  Neck, arms shoulders (no lateral movement/no elbow articulation), legs at hips (t-crotch) and knees.  This is the same recipe Kenner used for MASK’s Miles Mayhem’s military dress uniform, a format that would have looked better on 1:18 Joes in dress uniforms. 

But wait, there’s more!

Hasbro brought back Toht’s look for its Indiana Jones line with modernized articulation.  Although Toht didn’t get to production until several years later*, the Toht body did see use for a convention Cobra Commander in 2008.  The arms and legs have additional articulation.  Lateral shoulder movement, swivel/hinged elbows, swivel wrists, a swiveling waist (hidden within a rubber “skirt” portion of the suit), t-crotch hips, swivel/hinge knees, and swivel/hinge ankles.  All of these are technically improvements over the original figure, but the original 7 POA body is just fine like it is.   It’s worth noting that the modern figure doesn’t have the inside-the-hand burn mark of the original figure.  Hasbro may have substituted different hands for that reason, but I doubt it.* 

The torso on the modern Toht body is disrupted by the waistline articulation.  Other than adding a spot to attach the “skirt” portion, it doesn’t accomplish anything.  Better suit figures have simply made the entire torso part of the suit as its own animal, and that usually looks better.  The sculptor didn’t do his/her research either, and pushed all of the breast buttons below the belt line, which looks unintentionally silly and just a bit vulgar.

Even with far fewer points of articulation, Toht has a simple grace and fluid look that work nicely for a figure in a suit.  The newer format Toht body shows many articulation improvements if that’s your style preference, but offset by a poor torso. 


*yojoe.com states that the left hand (the figure’s right hand) was used from an Indiana Jones figure and that Toht was finally released later, in 2011.   

Tracked Assault Vehicle by Past Nastification

If you’re still shaking your head about the extra stupid Tread Ripper in 2013’s GI Joe Retaliation, this vehicle will either make your head shake more furiously, or stop shaking it all together.

If it frustrates you that Midwood Brands LLC can make something similar to -but better than- Hasbro’s Tread Ripper, then shake that head a little faster.  But if it makes you happy to see a basically unheard of company outperform Hasbro, then stop shaking that head, because the Tracked Assault Vehicle (TAV) is a good cheap toy.

Does Midwood Brands LLC design the products it sells, or just import them from China?  I have no idea, but I’ll be generous and approach this review as if they design the toys. 

Midwood Brands LLC is a toy supplier for Family Dollar, and is the maker of the “Imitation Vamp” and “Heroes Playset Fortress” from the last few years.  Technically, there isn’t even a name for the TAV, as it’s simply included in a “Military Vehicle Set 2pk”.  The other vehicle, if you’re curious, is a narrow-framed dune buggy (also technically unnamed).  I’ve referred to Family Dollar’s 1:18 vehicles as “GI Joe knock-offs” before in my reviews a joeaday.com.  But now that Hasbro doesn’t even have GI Joe product on store shelves, it’s more like Midwood Brands LLC is a juvenile trying to hold down the fort while Hasbro is out binge drinking.  That’s bad parenting, Hasbro. 

The TAV takes the Tread Ripper’s concept of having a driver cradled between two treads, but does it right.  The Tread Ripper has a more-or-less exposed driver’s seat in a strange position with a roll cage.   The TAV has the driver’s seat more centrally located and protected by a closing armored canopy (there isn’t any clear plastic to represent ballistic glass, but I’m willing to see it as an “imagination choice”).  Whereas the Tread Ripper driver could have a grenade easily lobbed at his/her feet, the driver of the TAV is as snug as a bug in a rug.

The overall bodylines are angular and triangular, with crisp detail.  There’s even a slight texture on the body, which is intentionally missing from some of the panels.  It’s a great attention to detail.  The TAV looks like something that a SWAT team would use to get into a fortified position inside of a city or other close-quarters environments.  Its design is compact but durable.  The front of the vehicle features an angled breaching blade, like an upside-down cattle plow from a train.  There is a very well detailed rotating/elevating machine gun mounted behind the canopy.  The strangest design element is an oversized paddle wheel along the centerline of the rear of the vehicle.  What would it do that two treads already couldn’t?  I have no idea, but I’m not opposed to its inclusion in the design- it rolls on the ground with the “hidden” wheels under the treads.  The TAV looks like a larger version of the real world Badger, which itself appears to have drawn on the look of the ’83 HISS tank.  Art imitates life imitates art?

Given the discount toy nature of the TAV, the plastic of the body is beefier than you might expect it to be.  The “technical details” on the paper stickers are nonsensical and there’s not much detail inside of the canopy.  The treads, of course, don’t actually move, but have the above-mentioned rolling wheels on the bottom.  This vehicle could very easily have been a one-piece shell, like Hasbro’s Cobra RAT, but it’s made of multiple pieces interlocked and screwed together.  Much better construction than I would have expected.  Full shame-filled disclosure:  I like the RAT.

The tan and black color scheme is a good starting point.  I could see customizers decking it out in Cobra blue/black or Joe olive drab, and maybe adding some “glass” to the canopy.

The TAV is probably a $3.00 vehicle, as the entire set sells for $8.00 (which includes the TAV, the narrow-framed dune buggy, a throw-it-in-the-trash action figure, and several oversized weapons).  At its price point, the TAV easily outshines Hasbro’s Tread Ripper.

The Tread Ripper looks like something a seven year old designed and a Hasbro executive somehow approved.  I’m aware that given the Tread Ripper’s movie origin, it may have been thought up in Hollywood instead of Rhode Island, but it’s still a ridiculous design.  The TAV, even with its paddle wheel, looks like a toy version of a plausible specialized real world vehicle.  Unlike the Tread Ripper, it’s also fun.

Fisher Price Turbo Hawk - By Past Nastification

I’m going to let you in on a little secret.  Cobra’s first jet wasn’t the Rattler.  It was the Fisher-Price Turbo Hawk. 

Released in 1982, a year before the beloved Sky Striker, this must have been Fisher-Price’s attempt at upping its game with the boys’ toys.  Released as a kit, the concept was that the child would assemble the toy.  The ARAH Joe vehicles were like this, but Hasbro didn’t stress the “kit” concept at all. 

Clearly a military vehicle based on the real word F-15, Fisher Price didn’t promote it that way.  There are no removable and/or molded-on missiles or a nose cannon, or any markings designating it as US Air Force.  It wasn’t molded in tombstone grey or olive drab.  But it is what it is.  When you look at it, it’s unmistakably a war machine.  The imagination of a 9 year old can make up for the “missing” weaponry and other issues.

Take a minute to appreciate the fact that Fisher Frickin’ Price made a 1:18 scale combat jet before Hasbro.  Not to mention a pretty good space shuttle, but that’s another review.     

Very under-scaled but moderately well detailed, the main body of the Turbo Hawk was also conveniently molded in a saturated blue instead of more realistic colors.  It’s not a dark early 80’s Cobra blue, but obviously GI Joe wouldn’t have a blue jet, right?  Hasbro would later use a similar blue on the HISS II or the ARAHC HISS, for what that’s worth.  The Turbo Hawk’s dark tinted canopy is also an elegant touch. 

I’m sure this vehicle has been customized in both black and Cobra blue, and I’m sure those look spectacular. 

The Sky Striker vs Rattler dogfight scenario always felt a bit lopsided in favor of the Joes.  With the Turbo Hawk, the playing field was a bit more level (despite its diminutive size and lack of any weapons).  Sky Striker vs. Turbo Hawk?  There’s a more evenly matched fight card.   

Speaking of the Sky Striker and the Rattler, they both fail the “drop test”.  Drop either one of them more than a foot and something will either pop off or break on them.  Much like the Tonka Hand Command Turbo Prop, the Turbo Hawk is a durable beast.   The canopy will likely pop off, but the rest of the vehicle will remain intact.  It’s a simple ruggedness that the ’82 wave of Joe vehicles had.  After the inaugural wave, most Joe vehicles lacked that sturdiness and it didn’t really return until the New Sculpt era.  Fisher-Price and Tonka vehicles, for the most part, were sturdy- and remain so today.  Think of how otherwise great items like the Killer Whale or Transportable Tactical Battle Platform turn into piles of parts over time.  Simple is better in some regards, and Fisher-Price was the king of simple.   

I obviously have a nostalgic soft spot for this vehicle, but it’s far from perfect.  It has no proper landing gear/struts, just tiny wheels on the bottom of the fuselage.  Like cutesy little shopping cart wheels.  The eye line of a figure standing next to the Turbo Hawk is higher than the canopy.  When I say the Turbo Hawk is under-scaled, that’s being generous.  It is the same length as the Battle Force 2000 Vector, with a nominally wider wingspan.  Because the Vector isn’t based on a real thing, it’s easier to accept it as being “realistic”.  Like how CGI dinosaurs look better than CGI humans, as you’ve never actually seen a real-life dinosaur with your own eyes (and, yes, I know that dinosaurs were real before becoming petroleum, which in turn became all the toys we adore, except for Lincoln Logs and Tinker Toys).  The cockpit has no detailing aside from a seat, and it’s a pretty bland seat at that.   

The Turbo Hawk included a very generic pilot.  The parts used don’t truly make for a convincing flight suit and give the figure a thicker look than you might expect for a fighter pilot.  The pilot is decked out in a crazy big helmet and a white jumpsuit.  The helmet’s size may have been accurately scaled for a generic safety helmet of the day.  I believe it was originally used for a dragster driver, but I’m not sure.  It doesn’t appear to be specifically designed as a “pilot” helmet.  For anyone toying with the idea of making Airwolf customs, this would actually be a good stand-in for those helmets.  As Adventure People go, it’s actually a fairly meh figure.  There’s just not much to it, aside from a nice logo on the back.  But for a figure designed to sit inside of the cockpit, it’s acceptable.

Almost any newer 1:18 scale jet would be an upgrade over the Turbo Hawk in terms of scale and detailing today.  Take your pick from Chap Mei, Solider Force, World Peace Keepers, GI Joe (when Hasbro actually tried), True Heroes, or maybe even Processed Plastics or similar super-cheap lines.  But there’s something to be said for the Fisher-Price Turbo Hawk, because it came first.           

2011 Polar Sharc and Ice Storm - By Past Nastification

GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra was such a horrible movie.  So horrible that it had sinking ice in it.  As in literal chunks of ice that were heavier than the water around them and the sunk towards the bottom of the ocean.  That bad. I saw a screening of it opening night across the street from the Wizard World convention in Chicago in 2009. About 4 minutes into the movie I realized that the movie I had waited 27 years to see wasn’t what I was going to be seen that evening.

Even got the extra fancy seats, too.  Such a waste.   

At least the movie provided collectors with a GI Joe toy line.  That toy line was a mixed bag.  The Polar Sharc is a perfect example of it. 

The Polar Sharc is a forgettable and undersized vehicle that looks like it drifted into the wrong packaging from a Star Wars line.  But the driver, Ice Storm, is a great if unnoticed figure. 

The Polar Sharc did appear in the movie, in the scene with the sinking ice, and even looked like the toy but larger.  The design doesn’t look like it belongs in any GI Joe landscape.  Not in the standard toyline, not in any of the comic books continuities or cartoon continuities.  We’ll put that on the film studio and not Hasbro.  Hasbro even did a good job of translating it into a toy.

It’s worth pointing out that the Polar Sharc’s release was delayed and it was hard to come by.  This is probably why there isn’t much like or dislike for it or Ice Storm.  I never saw it in Ross stores, and had even kept an eye out for it. 

More aquadynamic in overall form than the 1984 Sharc, the Polar Sharc has lots of crisp details.  In fact, if you love rivets, then this will be your favorite GI Joe vehicle ever.  It has hundreds of sculpted rivets across its hull.  The cockpit appears to be a padded mattress-style strip with no definitive head/foot areas, so a driver can be placed one of two ways:  on its back looking out the casket-style hatch, or placed belly-down with its face looking out the underside nose porthole, an obvious callback to the 1984 Sharc.  The cockpit/interior is nicely done, with lots of knobs and buttons, exposed control lines, and wiring.   There’s a removable torpedo-launching weapon on the underside.  The underside also sports a backpack peg for a figure, another 1984 Sharc callback. 

The more I look at the Polar Sharc, the more I should like it.  But I don’t.  It looks too much like something Obi-Wan Kenobi might have used on an adventure.   

Ice Storm, by contrast, is a figure I shouldn’t like, but I do. 

Ice Storm didn’t specifically appear in the film, although the Sharc did.  The 25A line provided us with at least three different versions of Deep Six, so I didn’t mind the creation of a new character at all.  The 2011 convention exclusive of this character (although a different figure with a different file name in technically a different continuity) backfills his story.  Now a sailor, he had originally been in the Coast Guard first, adding some complexity to his character.  I guess Cutter is destined to be the only dedicated Coast Guard member on the team? 

The figure is made of recycled 25A parts topped with a new head, and the body parts aren’t even that spectacular.  It looks nothing like a driver for the Polar Sharc should look.  Since I easily mentally separate this figure from the vehicle, that’s not an issue.  Ice Storm looks like a cold weather rescue specialist, and might even be wearing a drysuit under the cold weather uniform. 

The headsculpt is ridiculously awesome.  Ice Storm wears a textured knit cap pulled down low over the ears and eyebrows.  Although the face is sculpted, much of it hidden by the high jacket collar.  We only see Ice Storm’s face from the eye line to the mouth, giving a sense of seclusion and mystery, with dashes of introversion and sullenness.  This is my favorite ROC action figure.  Unlike existing characters that had to be “interpreted” into the ROC continuity, Ice Storm was a blank slate who didn’t get weird for no reason (I’m looking at the sculpted lips on your mask, Snake-Eyes).  In fairness, other interpretations in ROC were actually pretty solid ideas, like Storm Shadow wearing a white suit.     

The Polar Sharc and Ice Storm are both highly detailed and well sculpted.  The Polar Sharc fails because it’s a bad design at its core that no amount of craftsmanship could save, like the sinking ice in the movie.  It could never look good because it was a bad idea.  Ice Storm succeeds because the character was unique and fresh to the GI Joe mythos, plus it also felt like it shouldn’t even exist within the ROC continuity.  Always a plus.       

Married With Children Set - By Past Nastification

The world of 1:18 figures has had a nice influx of Joe-friendly brands and figures the last several years.  Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Back to the Future, many of The Twilight Zone figures, Saturday Night Live’s Tina Fey & Amy Poehler (which I wrote about on joeaday.com), The Big Bang Theory, and today’s review, Married with Children have all joined the ranks.

I should define “Joe-friendly”, as the reviews here are obviously aimed at Joe collectors.   Because the Bundys, unlike 1:18 scale Game of Thrones figures, can plausibly be used by collectors in dioramas as civilians without raising an eyebrow, I view them as “Joe-friendly”.  Sure, they’re more character specific than Fischer Price Adventure People, but if you dotted them throughout a Springfield diorama, an average person (that is to say, a normal grownup who doesn’t own toys) might not even notice what they are.  The figures could also be used for customizers with no problem. 

1:18 scale Al Bundy is Joe-Friendly; 1:18 Jar Jar Binks is not.  There is some grey area for sure, like the Star Wars Endor trooper(s).  They look real-world soldiery enough to slide into the grey zone.

This set is called “Married with Children” by Funko and it contains Al Bundy, Peggy Bundy, Kelly Bundy, and Bud Bundy.  This set is labeled as a “2018 Fall Convention Exclusive”.  Being an Amazon purchase, it couldn’t have been too exclusive, but I’m not sure if that means that there are variations in packaging or figure colors. 

The head sculpts set the tone for figures like this.  Whereas Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Twilight Zone figures go for a broad “why pay for likeness rights?” feel more than an actual likenesses, these figures actually have enough nuance and detail to look like the actors on whom they’re based (Ed O’Neil as Ed Bundy, Katey Sagal as Peg Bundy, Christina Applegate as Kelly Bundy, and David Faustino as Bud Bundy).  Unfortunately, the work put into the faces/heads wasn’t fully realized in production because the plastic is bit on the waxy side (think Stars and Stripes Forever) and the paint could be improved (Al and Bud don’t have eyelashes, creating blank stares on their faces).  On the upside of this, though, is that the unrealized potential makes them even more Joe-friendly.

Each of the figures is dressed and sculpted appropriate to the character.  I can’t say if the outfits are episode or opening credits accurate, but they look exactly like they need to.  The Kelly figure is begging to be customized into a Dreadnok, by the way.  Subtle details by the sculptor(s) show a good eye for detail.  Bud, for example, has one sneaker fully under the pant leg and the other one with the pant leg partially stuck into the sneaker.  Al, of course, sports a grin of frustration.  Peggy’s B-52 haircut and leopard print sandals (or are they cheetah print?) are wonderful.       

The figures are scaled correctly to each other, with Bud being about the same height as Kelly.  There are no accessories, and the lack of a canine Buck Bundy stings just a little bit.  This set should have come with a couch. 

The articulation on these figures is good, with 9 points of articulation on each figure.  The figures appear to have “swivel arm battle grip” at the elbows, but they don’t.  An extra piece of plastic is inserted into the bottom of the lower arm instead of being part of it.  The elbows only hinge.

Funko is using an interesting technique on some parts.  Instead of painting things to match, parts are molded in the correct color and then glued/locked into place.  Bud’s hands don’t swivel, but were molded in a flesh tone and then plugged into the end of the sleeve.  I managed to break one of Bud’s wrists thinking it swiveled.

The coloring on the figures isn’t photo realistic, but it’s about in the right range for Joe figures.  Kelly’s blonde hair, for example, isn’t simplistic Crayon yellow, but it’s not realistically platinum blonde (with a metallic wash for that lifelike look) either.  Instead, it’s a dull yellow tan that works for this caliber of figures.

Most likely a one-and-done figure line, we probably won’t get treated to Marcy D’Arcy, Jefferson D’Arcy, Buck Bundy, or Steve Rhodes.

These figures were clearly designed with a respect for the source material and are higher quality than similar “based on a TV show” figures.  They obviously work as intended as Married with Children figures, or even as Joe-friendly diorama pieces.       

2012 Retaliation Night Fox

After stumbling onto a 2012 Clutch figure, I embraced the low points of articulation (poa) Retaliation vehicle drivers.  Yes, it is Hasbro cutting corners to make an official GI Joe product.  But the sculpting impressed me so much I begrudgingly approved and went on to acquire a Night Fox.    The format, though cheap, has its appeal. 

Night Fox was included with the Ninja Combat Cruiser as its driver.  As that vehicle was a reworking of the VAMP, Clutch might have been a more appropriate driver.  Clutch may have actually appeared in Retaliation as the driver of the Tread Ripper.  However, my retinas can’t handle another viewing of that stankfest (and I’ve only seen it once), so there won’t be “research” to find out.

The Ninja Combat Cruiser merits its own review.  Mini-review:  surprisingly fun!

Night Fox first appeared in 2010 as the driver of the AWE Striker.  That figure and this version of Night Fox share a flaw.  The head is obscured by a mask.  I’ve gone on this rant before:  good guys (other than Snake-Eyes) should have visible heads.  Or at least ones with removable helmets or exposable faces.  ARAH Fastdraw works because the flip-up visor revealing his mug.  25A Beachhead works because there’s an alternate pop-on head.  And unlike the 2010 Night Fox, this one’s eyes are entirely obscured by goggles.

Speaking of obscured heads and the Retaliation driver figures, there’s also the Duke figure included with the Ghost Hawk II.  In my review of Clutch, I failed to list that as one of the low-poa Retaliation figures. 

In my Retaliation Clutch review I said I’d be fine with low poa Cobra Troopers as freebie pack-ins with vehicles or playsets.  This Night Fox would be the figure to use.  The head is realistically sculpted, but it doesn’t register as a specific Joe because it’s far too anonymous.  Mold the figure in Cobra blue, mold the vest in black, throw red on the mask and you’ve got an inexpensive Cobra Trooper.

Much like the original Night Fox, this one is calling out for a customized head swap.  Hasbro has given us alternate pop-on heads before.  Given that Hasbro already saved a buck by reducing the articulation, an extra unmasked head would’ve been a generous and appreciated move. 

The head is one of the few heads in the entire GI Joe run, ARAH through Modern Era, that has no paint applications.  It’s solid black.  Aside from a few Snake-Eyes (it seems like at least one NS Snake-Eyes was solid black in addition to the first ARAH one), the “hologram” Comic Pack Cobra Commander, and the clear GI Joe Collector’s Club Zartan, it’s very rare for a Joe figure to have zero paint applications on its head.

Like Retaliation Clutch, the sculpting on Night Fox is fantastic, assuming you can accept that it’s low poa.  The bend in the arms and at the knees, along with the outwardly angled feet, give Night Fox a fluid stance.  The uniform is crumpled and baggy.  The pouches on the vest are crisp and detailed, including one that’s marked as being a first aid pouch.  There’s even sculpted “extra” thigh strap material that lies drooping.  The arms are prepositioned to hold a rifle Palitoy Action Force style.  Which also means that Night Fox is also an unsafe, one-handed driver.  No “ten and two” hand positioning on the steering wheel for him.  Unlike his fellow Retaliation driver figure Clutch, Low Light has arms that are long enough for his proportions.   

The figure itself is molded in black, with only a dab of light khaki on the back of the neck.  This is only there to complete the illusion that the backpack runs across the shoulders.  The vest is dark khaki with some details popped out with light khaki paint.  I’ve read and seen complaints about the lack of paint applications on the body.  However, the figure’s codename does include the word “night” in it, so all-black isn’t unreasonable.

Please note that the action figure’s plastic is a bit darker than these images, which have been adjusted somewhat in Photoshop to show the detail.  Otherwise the figure would look like a solid black shape.

Night Fox’s accessories include a rifle and the removable vest.  This particular figure is missing its rifle, so I’ve substituted a Demro Wasp from Beachhead.  The vest is removable, but it’s not interchangeable with other figures because it’s keyed specifically for the Night Fox torso.  Odd, but it looks good on the figure.  The figure looks deformed without it, so going “vestless” isn’t an option. 

If you can accept low-poa figures, you’ll probably enjoy this figure.  If you can’t, it’s understandable.  Hasbro should be ashamed.  I’m just forgiving.

2008 Cobra Hostile Environment Trooper By Past Nastification

Included as part of the Extreme Conditions:  Desert Assault Squad set, the Cobra Hostile Environment Trooper took the Flash/Grand Slam body and topped it with the Cobra Officer Gas Mask helmet.  The helmet appears to be a reworking of the ARAH head of the Comic Pack set, which was turned into a removable helmet.  It was also released in Cobra Blue for use as the Cobra Air Trooper.   

At a first glance, this is a great figure.  The helmet alone pretty much would make any figure look great.

The color set used for this figure are perfect for a Cobra trooper.  A creamy tan for the uniform, with black boots and gloves, plus brown padding (in some indoor light the padding looks more burgundy- or maybe I just really really want it to). 

But at second glance reveals problems.  In 2008, when almost everyone was going crazy for the new 25A body style, its flaws were overlooked.  Those hands.  Those teeny tiny hands manage to screw up the proportions for the rest of the figure.  And then there’s the upper torso articulation point.  I’ve never liked these, but I can live with them when they’re hidden.  This body is frustrating because had the chest padding been removable, like many of the other webgear sets of the time, the upper torso articulation point would be largely hidden.   As it is, a streak of tan slices through the chest padding.  It’s visually disruptive.

But the bigger problem is that this is a Grand Slam/Flash body.  Color it however you like and top it with that amazing helmet… it’s still a Grand Slam/Flash body, which means it looks like Grand Slam or Flash.  Much too iconic to identify as a Cobra trooper, especially when kept complete.  Maybe mixing in different arms or legs would have offset the source body.  There were several 25A bodies that would have been passable without looking like Grand Slam/Flash clones at this point in the line. 

A silver Cobra biohazard logo is printed on the upper portion of the chest pad, but as good as it is, it can’t compete with the very intricate grid pattern already sculpted onto the padding.  The logo gets lost.  Despite its precision, it looks like a glop of silver.

As far as being biohazard-ready, this outfit doesn’t look like the highest level personal protective gear outfit.  It’s the “get you by until the Toxo-Vipers arrive” level.  For Cobra, this feels about right, so it’s okay.   

The head (under the helmet) is the 25A Cobra Trooper head, with tan hair painted on what was originally a bald scalp.  I don’t really have an issue with this because some people keep their heads nearly shaved, but other collectors find it a sticking point.  It probably should bother me, it just doesn’t.     

In addition to the helmet, the Cobra Hostile Environment Trooper comes with a Demro Wasp rifle (Beachhead’s rifle), a standard Cobra helmet, and Barbecue’s backpack w/hose and nozzle (this was before a modern era Airtight had been created, so his gear didn’t exist to utilize).

The fantastic helmet isn’t quite enough to make this a fantastic figure.     

Jonny Quest- 1996 Quest Porpoise By Past Nastification

You might be wondering why the 2002 Cobra Mantis Sub is in banana yellow.

This is the original version of that toy, the 1996 Quest Porpoise, a sporty two-person submarine in Galoob’s Jonny Quest line.  The Jonny Quest toy line ran from 1995-1996, parallel to Hanna-Barbera’s The Real Adventures of Jonny Quest cartoon (which itself was a reboot of the 1960’s Jonny Quest cartoon).  The figures were ever so slightly smaller and squatter than ARAH Joe figures, but they still feel like 1:18 figures.

By 1995, I had already left collecting toys behind for several years and wouldn’t cycle back as an “adult collector” until the Stars and Stripes Forever Set of 1997.  I didn’t have any awareness of Jonny Quest toys when they were new, so my first exposure to them was probably picking up a few pieces mixed in with GI Joe lots on eBay.  The Jonny Quest toy line is wonderful in that it generated what are essentially “civilian” action figures plus a smattering of weird translucent figures (the Matrix-like “Questworld” figures) and some hammy bad guys.  Many of the figures have an updated Adventure People feel, but with articulation and sculpt much closer to ARAH Joe.  The vehicles are so good that I never would have realized that the Night Landing Craft and the Quest Porpoise were rebranded had it not been for yojoe.com pointing it out.     

The Quest Porpoise and the Quest Wave Ranger were two vehicles Hasbro recycled as GI Joe/Cobra vehicles after acquiring Galoob.  The Quest Porpoise became the Cobra Mantis Sub; The Quest Wave Ranger became the Night Landing Craft.  Despite the slight scale mismatch between Jonny Quest and ARAH Joes, the vehicles would work just fine when repurpose for Joes 6 years later.

This particular Quest Porpoise is missing its antennae and part of its grabber claw, but you can still see the overall design.  It looks vaguely dolphin-like, much like the real world Seabreacher vehicles, but those didn’t come in existence until 2009 or so. Galoob was about 20 years ahead of the curve with its sleek design.

Ignoring that it was destined to become a Joe vehicle, comparisons to the GI Joe Sharc seem inevitable.  Both vehicles are submarines, although the Quest Porpoise isn’t a flying one (or I don’t think it’s supposed to be).  The shape of the QP looks more natural and aquadynamic than the Sharc.

The bright colors capture the tone of the Jonny Quest line.  Fun, carefree, and adventurous. 

The QP’s cockpit could even hold two back-to-back figures (think Empire Strikes Back Snow Speeder).  An ARAH Joe won’t fit in the rear-facing seat, so I believe there was some slight modification for the mold’s re-use as a Cobra vehicle.

The QP is decked out with features:

*Grabber claw
*Torpedo (sorry, no picture to show)
*Swiveling lights
*Periscope
*Opening canopy
*Two small side propellers and a large wind-up rear propeller
*Side mounted light array
*Underside hatch with line and claw
*Mostly hidden wheels

That’s a ton of details.  Unlike early Joe vehicles of the early 90’s, the features on the QP feel organic to the vehicle, not clunky or randomly thrown on.

As this vehicle came from the Jonny Quest line, a quick look at the included “Deep Dive” Jonny Quest figure is in order.  It’s not too deep a dive, because Jonny’s only wearing a wetsuit, not a full-on Deep Six style pressure suit.  The wetsuit is banana yellow to match the QP.   As a teenager, the Jonny Quest figure is smaller than the “grownup” figures in the line (as well as ARAH Joe figures).   The body has 11 points of articulation, but suffers from having swollen elbows and inexplicably wide hips.  If you’re not familiar with the bodies in this toy line, they are similar to ARAH ones, but lack lateral shoulder movement and the front/back is one piece from the bottom of the neck to the bottom of the crotch.  There is no separate waist piece or o-ring.

The wetsuit features a dive belt, a dive knife, and un-zipped zippers at the sleeve and pant leg cuffs (a simple, but nice touch).  Jonny has a scuba tank with a mask that looks more like a space helmet.  And two flippers for his feet.     

This is a great vehicle.  It’s easy to see why Hasbro repurposed it.  The figure, given that it’s not a Joe, isn’t too bad, either.

2001 Major Bludd - By Past Nastification

2001 was the last all ARAH year following the sputtering start of the Stars & Stripes Forever Set in 1997.  There were the comic pack figures and the GI Joe Collectors’ Club figures and even some ARAH figures packaged opposite New Sculpt figures.  

But the New Sculpt figures, as hated as they are now, were the belle of the ball in 2002.  The previous figures from the start of the new century were sort of left to wither on the vine of collector enthusiasm.  Except for Big Brawler, a character everyone hated with fiery animosity.  There were some decent figures in 2000 and 2001.   

It’s taken a long time for me to appreciate them. The head-to-toe repaints (Double Blast, Chameleon, White Out, Thunderwing) were a plague.   The not-different-enough-from-the-original-color-sets figures (Cobra Commander, Snake-Eyes) were too.

But several figures were repaints meant to represent the old characters in new uniforms that worked very nicely.  Major Bludd is the best.

This Major Bludd is a repaint of the 1991 Sonic Fighters Major Bludd.  With its blue uniform, collectors like the 1991 version because it showed Bludd growing some allegiance to Cobra.  But he’s a mercenary who only has an allegiance to money.  So the 1991 figure recolored in Bludd’s traditional brown fits the character much better.  With its silver grenades and black gear, this is a wonderful figure.  The head sculpt is an improvement over the 1983 version.  If only it had a removable helmet...  The body is bulkier, and not puffy chested hunchback big like some of the later ARAH figures.  

A decade in limbo makes the mold really appreciated.  It’s a good one.  

The unpainted dog tags are a missed opportunity to showcase another callback to the first Major Bludd figure, but the painted whites of the eyes add a touch of realism to the face. 

Major Bludd’s accessories are up for some debate, as the figure was included with a “Rock Viper” (a Range Viper that Hasbro sloppily misnamed).  I’ve pictured the grenade launcher, a dagger, and a strange rifle.  The strange rifle looks like it would have originally been an underwater accessory for a Cobra character, but is a repaint of the rifle included with the 1991 Major Bludd.  At least now it’s black instead of yellow.    

This is a contender for the best ARAH-style Major Bludd done for an American release.      

2012 Retaliation Clutch - By Past Nastification

The two live action GI Joe movies haven’t scratched the itch Joe fans wanted. They’ve provided a mixed bag of figures, too.  Some good, some bad.  Clutch, from GI Joe:  Retalition, was released as the driver of the Tread Ripper.  The Tread Ripper itself is another conversation and probably not a good one.

The low articulation of Clutch is problematic.   

When GI Joe debuted in ARAH format in 1982, the figures had an astounding 12 points of articulation compared to Star Wars, whose standard figures had just 5 poa’s.  Some Star Wars figures had even fewer.  For Joe figures the number jumped up to 14 with the inclusion of the “swivel arm battle grip” in 1983. Certainly Mego never gets the credit it deserves for bringing the o-ring(ish) design into the mainstream by licensing/selling Micronauts, or streamlining the concept for its the Black Hole, Buck Rogers, or CHIPs lines.

So GI Joe is somewhat erroneously credited, or at least remembered, as being the innovator.  And, yes, there’s the fact that the 1:18 scale Micronaut figures were conceptual downscales in Japan based on the original American 12 inch Joes… which were arguably based on the Barbie concept.  There are several episodes of Toy Galaxy on youtube or The Toys that Made Us on Netflix to see how many layers there are to the action figure onion.  It gets complicated very fast, with lots of cross-pollination and borrowing from one company/toy line to another.

All of which is a long way of explaining that most Joe collectors can’t stand Joe figures with low articulation.  Taking away the high poa count is depriving them of their design identity.  I agree in theory, but in reality… somehow I don’t care.  Maybe my appreciation of the early low poa Palitoy Action Force figures bleeds over to this figure.  That said, for the 1:18 scale, the inclusion of hinged knees should be a given.  Even Kenner’s MASK figures had that in the mid 80’s, and they were 2 inch figures.   

As a kid, I would have hated, hated, hated this Clutch.  As a grownup, though, I’m fine with it and the limited 5 poa format.  At this point in my collecting, sculpt is more important to me than articulation.

Clutch is so beautifully sculpted that the lack of articulation just doesn’t bother me.  Of course, that’s me, and I guess that 95% of Joe collector’s hate this figure.  It’s a point I really can’t argue.  For the handful of us that are immune to the low poa count that flies against everything that GI Joe is from a design standpoint, it’s easy to see the nice work in this figure.

It’s not perfect, and that’s assuming you can live with a five poa figure.  The arms are marginally short, but mostly hidden by the bent elbows.   As far as this figure automatically registering as being Clutch, it doesn’t. It should have a black beard or grey stubble to really be Clutch.

But this is the movie universe Clutch, so it is what it is.  But the detailing on the head alone is astounding.  The crisp baseball cap, the beard, and the up-to-the-minute sunglasses are flawlessly sculpted.  Customizers may hate the rest of this figure, but they love this head.

The uniform looks realistic.  Clutch sports a ton of sculpted pouches and webgear, including a pistol and a knife (both of which should have been painted black like the sunglasses).  The sculpting on the pouches is impressive because it’s so lifelike.  The pouches aren’t in perfect rows; each pouch is slightly canted and crooked compared to its neighboring pouches.  This is a detail that could have been easily overdone, but it wasn’t.  The bent elbows and slightly bent knees give the figure a dynamic posture that old Star Wars figures never had.  Plus, the sculpted detail would have been broken up by adding more articulation points.

The figure’s construction is peculiar.  It appears to be put together like a standard 5 poa figure (but with a pop-off head).  The backpack and most of the webgear appear to be a snapped-in-place piece on a carved-out section of the torso.   Oddly, the Night Fox figure, also a low poa Retaliation driver, features a removable vest, but it’s uniquely keyed to the figure.  So why was Clutch designed in such a unique manner?  Who knows. 

The use of subdued colors is a welcomed change from obnoxious coloring.  Honestly, though, an unexpected and nonsensical color pop somewhere might have added to the design.  A lone orange pouch or a yellow grenade could have worked here.   

Maybe it’s just the sunglasses, but this Clutch has a badass quality that no previous Clutch figures have had.  The pistol might not be removable, but it has no less that 6 pouched magazines ready to go for it.  At the 1:18 scale, I prefer non-functioning holsters as they look more correctly sized. 

There were several other 5 poa figures in the Retaliation line.  This included the previously mentioned Night Fox, a Snake-Eyes, a Cobra Commander, and a Swamp Viper.  I was surprised by how much I liked the Clutch figure, so I’ll have to keep an eye out for the rest out and see if they also have outstanding sculpting.  I stumbled onto this Clutch figure recently and until I saw it in person I was lackluster about it.   

If the low poa count is a deal breaker for you, I completely understand and respect it.  But if you’re someone who can accept it, this is an impressive figure.  If you need a nudge, here’s an image of the head swapped out with a “real” Clutch head, from the 25A line.  If nothing else, just try to appreciate the sculpting on this odd duck from the Retaliation line.

I’m curious, am I alone in liking this figure?  Does anyone else like it or the other Retaliation drivers?

Would anyone really object if Hasbro would have made mostly pre-posed/low poa Cobra Soldiers in this format and packed them in as freebies with vehicles and playsets?  No.  Well, at least I wouldn’t!